Following CNN’s fake news slander of upstanding champion of freedom Mark Robinson, Newsmax today dropped a bombshell investigative report on Tim Walz, showing a consistent record over at least eight years of Walz lying to his children about the existence of Santa Claus (a socialist, by the way, giving kids free presents when there’s no such thing as a free lunch!!)

Walz would, for instance, tell his kids that the Super Soakers he got them at Toys “R” Us and – crucially – not the North Pole were given to them by “Santa” for free for good behavior (a way to indoctrinate his kids to fall in line with a communist government instead of teaching them the merits of capitalism that bought them the Super Soakers!) But then at some point, he told them that Santa Claus wasn’t real, by his own admission even making Gus feel “a bit bummed out”.

When questioned on this issue, Walz replied that he thought this was “really pretty common” and that he doesn’t even see an issue with it. Is this the kind of man we want as our vice president?!

  • @edwardbear
    link
    162 months ago

    Obviously a monster. I also heard he gave those kids hot cocoa with marshmallows on top. Does he not know the inherent dangers of giving kids sugar? Is he trying to kill them? More at 8.

    • TheTechnician27OP
      link
      English
      72 months ago

      Do you know if the rumors are true that he made them leave out cookies and milk for “Santa” (just like taxes!) but then ate them himself instead?

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        62 months ago

        Lots of people are saying that he did just that. Additionally, i heard that they made gingerbread men as a family where the kids were just given the gumdrops and frosting as free handouts. What a socialist

  • @ccunning
    link
    112 months ago

    Suddenly Santa’s red suit makes perfect sense.

    The pieces are really coming together now…

  • @NineMileTowerM
    link
    42 months ago

    Sounds like Tim is fighting in the war on Christmas.