• @shalafi
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    259 days ago

    Reminds me of the Beanie Baby divorce.

    • @[email protected]
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      129 days ago

      If I got married (somehow) and subsequently divorced, I’d probably have to do this with my fumos.

      Not that I ought to be concerned, of course, given that my mere ownership of fumos renders the prospect of marriage entirely hypothetical.

      • @[email protected]
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        59 days ago

        I had to Google that. Never heard of them, but they don’t strike me as radically different than Funko Pops. I know married people with those. Someone out there probably likes you, or would if they met you.

      • @shalafi
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        19 days ago

        On my third marriage. There is about nothing anyone of us wanted from the other, amicable as far as stuff and finances. Can’t imagine arguing over material crap. What’s hers is hers, mine is mine.

  • @[email protected]
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    209 days ago

    For the public, this probably sounds like a strange and non prestigious reason to pursue a career in law, but for lawyers, dealing with people’s idiosyncrasies is one of the juiciest and most interesting parts of the job and a big reason to be drawn to the profession to begin with.

    • Tar_Alcaran
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      15 days ago

      I think everyone in any profession like to talk about “the weird stuff” most.

  • @[email protected]
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    108 days ago

    Say the bird does start talking shit about one of them: how do you prove it was the other person to teach the bird and not the person being insulted?

    This isn’t enforceable.

    • @[email protected]
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      68 days ago

      Has to be a really dreadful divorce if you spend tens of hours teaching “Michael is a shitmuncher” to your parrot, just so your ex-partner loses visitation rights to it, and you get to listen to it repeating that phrase for the 30+ years of both your miserable lives.

      • @[email protected]
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        58 days ago

        This is the kind of petty shit bitter divorcees do a lot. At least they aren’t setting up stuff to prevent the other from killing the damned bird to spite their ex.

      • @[email protected]
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        8 days ago

        Broken hearts can be horribly spiteful; planning for the future isn’t often part of that equation.

    • @[email protected]
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      37 days ago

      “If the bird talks bad about either person, it will be handed over to a third party for adoption.”

      “You’re welcome, and that will be $3,000.”

      –my lawyer, probably

  • @[email protected]
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    9 days ago

    I hope the parrot is bonded to both of them, or has a second parrot friend. Parrots will legit get sick if they stay away from their partners too long/often

    • @mojofrododojo
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      7 days ago

      “I shan’t mince words with you, I am challenging you to a duel!”

      “I accept.”

      “You don’t want time to think it over?”

      "No, no, I accept your challenge. What time were you thinking about dueling?

      “Any time is good, uh, you don’t have time, you’d have to get a gun”"

      “I have a gun right here. I even keep it loaded. You never know who’s going to walk in…” “Anyway how does noon sound? I’m gonna put one right between your teeth and it’s gonna pop out the back of your neck.”

      goddamn I love that lawyer character

  • @[email protected]
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    49 days ago

    Seems entirely reasonable. Honestly, more reasonable than visitation about dogs or cats which are much less long-lived animals.