Maybe this is really silly or useless, but I was having another one of those moments looking in the mirror, analyzing my face and unable to see myself, but I discovered if I blur my vision slightly and let my field of vision become a bit more “big picture”, my brain correctly genders me. Maybe this is true for others?
Sometimes I recognize how arbitrary my perception of gender is (with myself and others), and maybe it’s just pragmatic to mess with your own perception when feeling down about how you look and not being able to see yourself.
I feel a bit insecure sharing this, it feels like an anti-tip to me, like saying, “are you feeling ugly? close your eyes!” - but I only share it because I actually did feel some happiness from it and it interrupted a moment of dysphoric obsessing. Can’t be that bad to have a coping mechanism to do that, right?
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My perspective might be a bit different as someone non-binary that is not pursuing HRT at this point in my life. Over the years when I feel dysphoric and don’t feel like who is in the mirror matches my perception of myself, I try to take the time to verbally complement myself or say something out loud that I have been having a hard time internally processing.
It helps me to feel like someone is being kind or helpful to me, and that even if the person in the mirror doesn’t feel like who I am that they are at the minimum an ally in my journey through life.
Yesss! One of the best parts of my day- waking up in the morning with blurry vision (morning vision+no glasses/contacts), removing my silk bonnet, having my hair gently fall out, and seeing myself from my standing mirror across the room. My hair looks beautiful, skin glowing, and I feel soo cozy. I get to see all the work the HRT is doing without being super critical of the things that are still shaping and changing!
I think it’s a good technique! Remember, very few people see you as closely as you see yourself. Most people will miss those little details and go for the vibe, which is what you’re tricking your brain into doing here.
yes, exactly! I want to be able to see what others are seeing 😅 Impossible, of course, but this was a way to at least undermine my brain worms a little, lol
I also do this! As soon as the contacts come out, the dysphoria softens.
do a very similar thing ourselves, super valid
Oh, that could work. I like it!
Sounds a bit like when I catch my reflection in a window or whatever: I don’t see any of the details and can perceive it how I want.
