“I was first introduced to it as a child by a man of the cloth. From there, I was introduced to many republican politicians vacationing in homosexuality with children. Once reaching the undesirable age of 13, I found opportunities with blue collar republican voters whose wives had never developed a taste for penis.”

I signed a EULA and didn’t read it first.

I became gay a few days ago when everyone in the US was reclassified into women.