• @Cabrio
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      1 year ago

      My tips for surviving beyond middle age.

      Move to a country with socialised healthcare and reasonable unemployment systems.

      Develop a mental illness, you’re 36 so you probably have a couple already.

      Apply for disability and reduce your workload to 20 hours a week.

      Have your parents die so you can have a chance at owning a house so you have somewhere to die other than hospice.

      Kids are a double edged sword, kill you now, look after you later. Might be better financially to not bother, as you’ll have to go back to full time work just for a chance to ensure they don’t grow up neglected, and if they do there goes your retirement.

      • @electrogamerman
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        31 year ago

        Have your parents die? So murder your parents?

        Also Kids are not a double edge sword. You are not supposed to have kids, so they take care of you when you are old. That’s just a recipe for them growing up neglected.

      • @phaeton83
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        21 year ago

        Countries with socialized healthcare and reasonable unemployment systems aren’t letting poor Americans in.

        • @Cabrio
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          21 year ago

          Don’t worry, depending which way the election swings you’ll probably have a legitimate reason to seek asylum.

  • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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    161 year ago

    Really easy. Go by 30s.

    0-30: young

    30-60: middle aged

    60+: elderly

    So yeah, 50 is middle aged, it’s just not the start.

  • @JehovasThickness
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    161 year ago

    Reading that middle aged should be 36 is doing all kinds of stuff to my perception of time…

  • @[email protected]
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    131 year ago

    A litte off topic, but still interesting: What you are referring to is the life expectancy at birth. Your life expectancy actually increases as you get older, since you already survived and the people who already died are not factored in anymore.

    https://www.ssa.gov/oact/STATS/table4c6.html

    So according to that table when you are born your life expectancy is 74.12, but when you already made it to 50 it rises to 78.33 (current age + life expectancy from the table).

  • Drusas
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    111 year ago

    Joke’s on them, I became disabled at 33.

    Oh wait, the joke was on me.

    • @johnthebeboptist
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      21 year ago

      Cue Bee Gees “I started a joke”, or not, that song is super depressing. Low made it even more depressing, just in case someone wants to check it out.

  • @[email protected]
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    31 year ago

    While I agree to a point, I’m not fucking calling myself middle aged. My knees hurt enough.