So, I’m a pretty average-height guy—5’7”. Not tall, not short, just… there. My feet, however, did not get the memo. They are gigantic. Size 15. Which means I leave footprints that suggest someone much larger (or possibly Bigfoot) passed through, got spooked, and took off running.
People always comment. First, the double-take. Then: “Whoa. Those are… big.” And finally, the classic: “How do you even find shoes?”
Badly. That’s how.
Shoe shopping for me is like searching for an ancient artifact. Store clerks disappear into the back, only to return shaking their heads, as if I’d asked for a unicorn saddle. “We might have one pair in the back…” And what they bring out is always tragic—some orthopedic dad sneaker the size of a small canoe, usually in a shade best described as “beige disappointment.”
For a while, I tried to hide it. I slouched. I crammed my toes into size 13s like a Victorian woman chasing a terrible beauty standard. I even considered custom shoes—until I saw the price and briefly thought maybe barefoot life isn’t so bad.
But now? I’ve embraced it. I don’t tip over easily. I get extra legroom on buses just by existing. And when people ask about my shoe size, I just smile and say, “Great for swimming.”
You should start an onlyfans for your feet. Then you could buy custom shoes with the money.
You’ll grow into it
You could see your feet coming around the corner then about 10 minutes later you show up.
You look happy, though. I can’t imagine why 😉
So EU size 47.
Geländevernichtungsbretter (ground flattening boards) or Kindersärge (childrens coffins), as we call those kinds of shoes. I had a friend with EU size 48, but at least he had the matching height.
My Vans are a 49 EU?
Bro could hang 10 off an awning
My sympathies. I’m allergic to latex and shoe shopping was dreadful. My reaction was delayed, so my feet would itch after a day of wearing the new shoes, at which point they’re not returnable.
I finally found a brand that doesn’t use latex in their adhesive or soles. I’m loyal AF to that brand. I suspect you’re similarly loyal to whatever shoes work for you.
Donald duck lookin ass
A couple months back there was a guy, maybe 6’ tall and had a size 4 or 5 shoe. I can’t seem to find it. Anyone halp?
Probably the same person making stuff up.
How does anyone not see the photos are clearly badly photoshopped is a mystery.
Another photo of me measuring them bro. Pardon the awful hairdo.deleted by creator
That’s lens distortion, any wide lens will show it
Granted I’m on my phone, but I’ve stared at this image for a solid minute and I can’t see the Photoshop artifacts. Can you hit us with the useless red circle or arrows?
okay so:
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does this make running a problem or are you actually a better runner than the average person? looks like it would be a hindrance but I’m curious
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obviously there are rumors about feet size … do you find women coming on to you more because of this?
1 Certainly makes it easier to drag your toes while pedaling a bicycle.
You should be pedaling with the balls of your feet. Toe drag would only be an issue in a tight turn, but you can scrape your pedal doing that if you set your pedals wrong, so your toes don’t matter much.
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This man cannot be knocked over.
Donald and Goofy have been searching for him.
You sir, are a comedy genius. I couldn’t stop laughing.
If you need to just start commissioning custom footware, might I suggest you go for the classic Poulaine?
And ittybitty ankles. Ok
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