Isn’t this what Agile* is supposed to solve?
*The actual principles of Agile, not whatever bastardised version your team is doing!
How many story points is it to get to 2nd base?
How many fully stacked devs does it take do scrum her to the altar?
My old manager sent out invitations to the bride‘s family before telling me I was the groom.
(he publicly announced the new product‘s price and release date before telling the dev team that there will be a new product)
I’ve never had a boss who didn’t do this. Promise, set timeline and price, get contracts signed, then come to the development team to ask whether it’s possible to do by Wednesday. Many years ago I had a boss who promiseda major client that we’d provide an entire online advertising network to rival Google Ads, and gave us 4 days to design, develop and deliver it. Then when it wasn’t ready he threw one of the developers under the bus in a meeting with the customer. He actually used the words, “This is Dave’s fault.” Dave was professional and didnt argue. Good look for a CEO. I’m sure he thought he had won. The project went nowhere because all the execs had different ideas about what it was supposed to do, and the dev team was oddly unmotivated to help them out.
Fucking 4 days.
Well, in Dave’s CEO’s defense, it was just Google Ads.
Just, you know, that thing that largely provides the income for a world top-ten company.
Research projects:
“I’ve set the wedding date. I’m not sure they exist.”
The grant proposal:
“They definitely exist, and this marriage will change the world. The wedding must be funded now or else we risk someone else marrying them and getting all the credit for the wedding.”
Working for a global consulting firm I can agree.
