“You’re a Englishman Harry”
Missed opportunity for punchline.
The reason in books: muggles will oppress or kill them, falls flat in the face of their overwhelming power. And the fact that they’ve never had much is an issue.
I don’t remember if it was a main book or one of those charity publications but she specifically decided to mention that witch burnings, when they caught a real witch, just resulted in the witch casting a spell that made fire tickle a bit.
I also remember this from the books, some even enjoyed it to the point of getting caught on purpose
Kinky
Wendelin the Weird was into freaky shit.
Just because someone is unsuccessful in killing you doesn’t mean it’s okay that they continue to try though.
Those fuckers can duplicate food and never go hungry, but never share. They deserve to be burned.
can duplicate food and never go hungry
Technically, duplicating food is not that feasible. That was a plot point covered in the seventh book.
I didn’t really think they actually covered that plot point well.
The biggest problem iirc is a duplicated loaf of bread has the same expiration date as the original, so you can’t actually make bread last forever with duplication without it getting moldy. Preservation charms wear off the same as muggle preservatives do.
But I don’t see why dried or smoked food couldn’t be duplicated for months or years. The biggest threat would be scurvy at that point.
Even with those limitations, duplication would still allow food producers to make less food go a longer way. Smaller farms could feed more people, reducing pollution. You could duplicate the food at the point of sale, which would drastically reduce transportation costs as well as traffic. Hell, cities could have small farms and fed themselves. It would also drastically reduce water consumption that is used in farming, reducing droughts. Producing and transporting food is a massive contributor to global warming. Farms and ranches take up tons of space, all that land could be returned to its natural state (I bet wizards could speed that up).
If wizards showed up with the cure to cancer and fed the hungry they’d easily have 1/5 of the world’s population on their side. Unfortunately the wizarding society is extremely exploitative of animals, even worse than the average muggle.
I get that wizards were persecuted and don’t want to have muggles expect them to solve all their problems, but they could literally save the planet.
Absolutely! Wizards can also cast longer-term enchantments in addition to duplicating food, so they could also provide self-stirring cooking pots and self-fueled stoves and self-cooling ice chests. That doesn’t even get in to Arthur Weasley tinkering like the flying Ford.
Wizards deserved it.
Does it, tho? Wizards are powerful, sure, but they’re severely outnumbered, and almost completely ignorant of technology. What’s your Avada Kedavra, that moves slow enough that untrained school children can dodge it, gonna do against the Mother of all Bombs? Or a nuke?
Don’t underestimate muggles.
The issue is that wizards can instantly wage a guerilla war. All it takes is Muggle Studies being taken seriously and integration in muggle society. Then it’s impossible to identify them. Wandless magic could be a focus to be certain you’re never carrying an identifying marker.
Then the wizards don’t need to attack. They can destabilize the economy by duplicating money, precious resources, etc. These will deteriorate eventually but cause chaos and devalue the economy for a time. Imagine taking a $100 bill and just duplicating it to prop up your car-wash business as a front. But that’s baby-level chicanery.
The real sauce is the mind-control. Imperio (who cares if it’s unforgivable when you’re at war?) and more importantly the Memory Charm and False Memory spells. Let’s just get in there, stun a very important person (start low, work up) and insert the memories you need to get them to act accordingly. Remove the memories of that transaction and boom! Access to the most powerful people in the world and the ability to influence them. Now a wizard has their finger (remotely) on the nuclear button!
Seriously. Voldemort was an idiot. He used basic terror tactics for years and the only reason he wasn’t killed quickly was because Magical Britian was written to be as stupid as possible because Rowling was writing a children’s story about incompetent leaders.
This is now my favourite comment on Lemmy
Voldemort casts Fiend fire Its not effective.
Harry Truman casts Nuke 2x Its super effective!
“Also what’s the ethical structure behind literally enslaving a species of creatures and forcing them to cook our meals and keep our homes?”
“Well Harry you see, they’re lesser than us and also they like it that way”
“…”
(Harry Potter? Not a great book series, from a not-great philosophical mind.)
the house elves literally enslave themselves tho. the wizards aren’t the ones casting the spell to enslave them, they just are.
And you can magically undo this enslavement by giving them some clothing. There is no ethical reason not to.
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and the enchantment makes them sad when that happens. being servants makes them happy. that’s how they work in this world.
Dobby?
the entire plot line about dobby is that he’s extremely strange for a house elf. there is not a single other example of an elf like him in any of the books and every single other house elf admonish him for wanting to be free.
It’s still slavery and slavery is bad in any context.
The author invested a lot of effort into creating a context where slavery could be justified. She even created a whole subplot for the express purpose of painting people who want to end slavery as misguided.
the slaves don’t want to be free though. they near universally hate the idea of being freed and are terrified of being given clothes.
Credit to https://www.existentialcomics.com/
Check em out!
Never seen these before, thanks for sharing the link!
Don’t they have russians and the french as well?
Have you seen Russian and French cultures lately?
Or historically?
The roided out quidditch team was from Bulgaria
I think there was mention of a Japanese school as well.
And one for the rest of asia
Im not kiddingIs Koldovstoretz in Europe or Asia? In any case, it seems a bit strange that Europe gets three schools, but only one each for North America, South America, and Africa. Also no mention of schools in India or China, which both have a sizable population and a presumably proportional number of wizards…
Maybe they don’t get along, or they use magic in entirely different and incompatible ways.
Yes, every country has wizards in the books. So while the comic is funny, it doesn’t actually make sense.
this but god instead of dumbledore
“If everyone knows magic, then it’s not special anymore, Harry! Don’t YOU want to be special?”
you can tell no one has actually read the books, because this is addressed at least twice. they don’t share their magic because they are a massive minority on earth. in the entirety of the british isles there are less than 3000 children under 17. in the previous centuries the wizards had be persecuted to near extinction. additionally, they don’t want muggles to go to wizards to solve everyone of their problems. these are the people who where shitting in the corner until muggles invented the toilet.
Hilarious. Wasn’t expecting that.
Blimey! Dumbledore certainly didn’t expect such a Spanish Inquisition!
I use br*tish as a slur
