The last pride parade I attended was as an enthusiastic and supportive straight ally (lol).
It was a couple years ago, pre covid, and since then I’ve… noticed some things about myself that obviously led me here.
I came out to myself in February of this year after a same sex experience that left me with no more questions in my mind (holy fuck girls are soft) so I’m pretty new to this.
But I’m still very much closeted to my friends and family because I’m married (to a wonderful man) and I’m not really ready to have a conversation with people about how my relationships are organized (cause that same sex experience wasn’t just a one off thing. It’s a long distance… thing. Like, I love them).
So on the one hand, it shouldn’t really matter if someone in my life finds out I’m Bi. The real part I’m closeted about is that I’m polyamorous but I’m not really at a place of “pride” with any of it.
My husband knows, obviously, and he’s coming to the parade with me so if I just don’t advertise my bisexuality then I’m safe and I’ll basically be attending exactly the same way I attended before.
But I wanna paint a little bisexual coloured heart on my cheek.
And I want to do this properly, just for myself. Like, it feels very antithetical to ATTENDING PRIDE to do so in a way where I pretend I’m straight.
So advice? Support? Tell me about your first pride parade as a bisexual!
Also the chances of me running into someone I know are basically zero. I live in a massive city. My fear of the little pink, purple, blue heart is completely unreasonable. My brain is just really talented at finding things for me to feel bad about.
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Why over think it? Attend the parade to show support. Go with the bi heart if you want. If someone recognizes you and puts the two together, good for them. No need to make a big deal of it if you don’t want to. Being out is all about being able to live your true self freely, not about advertising to the world your sexuality.
I attended my first pride wearing a pink/purple/blue tutu. No one questioned me. No one said anything except that they liked my tutu and shirt (pride in rainbow, both self made because stores didn’t sell “pride merch” at the time :p). Everyone was welcoming, everyone was nice, and it was fun to be “out” outside the house.
You don’t have to be out to everyone to be out at pride, and it’s a good experience to feel that acceptance, especially if you don’t already have it outside your romantic circle. If it still feels strange, be subtle, but be open to saying “I’m bi, this is my husband, unfortunately my gf couldn’t come.” Or whatever version of that feels good to you, but if your pride is anything like my first one, you will leave feeling seen and validated.
The only thing antithetical to pride is whipping yourself over the term upon which you attend it. Just go.
