My guess of future events.

Small child tells class mates about the magic returning shoe.

The next day, Laura walks out to her garden to find many small shoes…

My cabbages!

“Ow! My head!”

“Who throws a shoe?!”

“Hey asshole! There are kids over here!”

I had a cat who insisted on going outside every day when I left for work. Rain, shine, snow, it didn’t matter he would worm his way out the door when I left for work. One day I had the day off, so I decided to wash my car. I open the door and my cat takes off. A few moments later, I hear a bunch of kids at the day care next to my apartment yelling, “kitty is back!!!” Turns out her would jump the fence and go hang out with the kids whenever they were playing outside.

Claims not to be a monster. Still posts on Twitter. Mmmhmm

Lord Jesus, baby, please!

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