I want people to stop saying that, but it is what it is.

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Seems like this is frequently used by arseholes in work situations to mean, “I am not going to address your concerns in any meaningful way and expect you to just get on with it.”

That is, very much, not what it is, rather it is what they have decided it will be with a side of cowardice.

I was using it a lot last year and the year before when my estranged mother suffered with her husband getting dementia and then dying of it, being isolated during lockdown and then she succumbed to Alzheimer’s and so had to go into a home and then six months later she died.

I had no say in any of it and as her last surviving child I had to take on her physical and mental wellbeing as well as do all the admin to do with her house so she could stay at home for as long as possible (she told me this was what she wanted.)

It was what it was.