Like a cold butter knife through concrete.

You’ll be one of the first they come after.

Whatever, I’m pretty sure he’s rubbing one out nightly to the thoughts of starving brown children.

They’re just meatbags. Possessed by demons? Sure, maybe. Probably.

Maybe the asteroid impact actually changed the rotational speed of the planet and increased gravity. There, I just created a new theory.

What a shitty way to go that would have been for the dinosaurs and any other giant species. Imagine some ELE hitting humankind but sparing all the little people.

Fuck, now I can’t unconsider it.

Poor Toby. He wasn’t even all that bad, as far as HR goes.

Judge says something.

Trump admin says “no lol”

Probably more. Their starving employees will be stealing food from them to survive.

Did you know Mr. Johnson’s nickname in high school was ‘Tiny’?

Maybe air traffic controllers should start making errors in routing for private jets, due to overwork and stress.

He’s the shadow president because Nosferatu cannot abide the light.

Sold exclusively through TrumpRX! What a steal!

Your figures are wonky. There are ~42 million people on SNAP.

It’s a shame real ICE didn’t abduct and deport her in a case of mistaken identity.

Hmm that would be 7 years of snap benefits.

This is me over and over again in the grocery store. Apart from the munching first, that is.

We lost the fight in 2024. Try to remember to turn off the lights if you’re the last one out.

2026 midterms will be the test run for the fixed elections in 2028.

Nothing to see here. They’ll cry to their pet Supreme Court justices and this will be overruled.