I get to make this choice soon. We’re planning on having our first kid soon, and my wife makes way more money than me. She’ll support me whether or not I choose to be a a stay-at-home dad. I appreciate hearing from someone who has been there!
I hemmed and hawed for a few months but what brought me to my decision to leave my career was the extra thousands of hours I would get with my kids as they grow up. That time is just SO much more valuable than money.
Sure, we could make ~250k a year combined, aggressively invest, and enjoy a lavish lifestyle in our 50’s. But at what cost?
So, I spend my days with the kids and my wife works from her in-home therapy office—with dialed-back hours to enjoy 3-day weekends with us. One day we will retire comfortably enough to get a decent RV, travel 1-2x a year, and dig into hobbies. And the trade off for less wealth? We’ll have rock solid relationships with our children with so many fond memories of their childhood—far more than we’d have if we both spent 40+ hours a week working.
As I’m sure you know, it’s an extremely fortunate position to be in. If you choose to resign and take the plunge into SAHD life you can always return to work if you decide it’s just not for you. Good luck!
Oh, and one more thing: I have a book recommendation. I think it should be mandatory reading for all parents. It’s called ‘Playful Parenting: An Exciting New Approach to Raising Children That Will Help You Nurture Close Connections, Solve Behavior Problems, and Encourage Confidence’ by Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D. I’m almost done with it. My kids are 7 and 15; I wish I read it years ago but it is what it is.
Wow, that was better than any reply I ever received on Reddit. Thanks for taking the time to respond and sharing your experience. I will definitely check the book out!
I would advise you to try to find if it’s actually viable (and how hard it is) to go back to a job comparable with what you have now after being a couple years out of the market. I think this is something that varies from place to place and it’s a known problem here (Brazil). I don’t know how dependent on age, sex or career it is, though.
I get to make this choice soon. We’re planning on having our first kid soon, and my wife makes way more money than me. She’ll support me whether or not I choose to be a a stay-at-home dad. I appreciate hearing from someone who has been there!
I hemmed and hawed for a few months but what brought me to my decision to leave my career was the extra thousands of hours I would get with my kids as they grow up. That time is just SO much more valuable than money.
Sure, we could make ~250k a year combined, aggressively invest, and enjoy a lavish lifestyle in our 50’s. But at what cost?
So, I spend my days with the kids and my wife works from her in-home therapy office—with dialed-back hours to enjoy 3-day weekends with us. One day we will retire comfortably enough to get a decent RV, travel 1-2x a year, and dig into hobbies. And the trade off for less wealth? We’ll have rock solid relationships with our children with so many fond memories of their childhood—far more than we’d have if we both spent 40+ hours a week working.
As I’m sure you know, it’s an extremely fortunate position to be in. If you choose to resign and take the plunge into SAHD life you can always return to work if you decide it’s just not for you. Good luck!
Oh, and one more thing: I have a book recommendation. I think it should be mandatory reading for all parents. It’s called ‘Playful Parenting: An Exciting New Approach to Raising Children That Will Help You Nurture Close Connections, Solve Behavior Problems, and Encourage Confidence’ by Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D. I’m almost done with it. My kids are 7 and 15; I wish I read it years ago but it is what it is.
Wow, that was better than any reply I ever received on Reddit. Thanks for taking the time to respond and sharing your experience. I will definitely check the book out!
I would advise you to try to find if it’s actually viable (and how hard it is) to go back to a job comparable with what you have now after being a couple years out of the market. I think this is something that varies from place to place and it’s a known problem here (Brazil). I don’t know how dependent on age, sex or career it is, though.