• @TheGrandNagus
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    124 months ago

    When I’m feeling under the weather is the only time I feel like I can just allow myself to be looked after and nurtured.

    In my wider life, men are generally expected to be independent and never ask for help or be helped, because then they’re somehow less of a man. My partner is guilty of this too, despite being a pretty progressive woman in general.

    And yeah, I know it’s yet another toxic aspect of our gender culture that should be rejected, but it’s been ingrained in me for 39 years now… It’s hard to set aside, especially when other people’s perceptions of you do affect how you’re treated.

    • @Lumisal
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      34 months ago

      I sometimes wonder how much of that culture is influenced by biology. In many other animals, it’s a survival mechanism to feign you’re doing fine even if you’re injured or sick, because otherwise predators will target you and it’s harder to find a mate.

      I wonder if traces of that still linger and, due to our much more complex social structures and high intelligence, it’s displayed culturally the way it is.