Say what you will about JD, but don’t call him an inconsiderate couch fucker.

This man knows how to romance a piece of upholstery. This man is a master of the art of couchilingus. This man can fluff a damn cushion, and I respect him for that, I do.

But he’s a weird creepy regressive goblin who will happily usher in the end of democracy in America, so there is that.