The Thieves Guild punchcard: Get 12 muggings and the 13th converts your mugging to a light burgling at the address of your choice! [*]
[*] You must present your punchcard before physical violence begins. If the address to be burgled is a police station, the next mugging will be upgraded to murder. Management takes 75% of all tips. Do not make Management sad. You wouldn’t like Management when it is sad.
The Thieves Guild punchcard: Get 12 muggings and the 13th converts your mugging to a light burgling at the address of your choice! [*]
[*] You must present your punchcard before physical violence begins. If the address to be burgled is a police station, the next mugging will be upgraded to murder. Management takes 75% of all tips. Do not make Management sad. You wouldn’t like Management when it is sad.
That first bit reads so much like Pratchett
If it’s not then props, it reads almost exactly like a line from one of the Night Watch books would
That’s exactly what I was going for, but I changed watch house to police station for the non-Discworld enthusiasts.
Success, I’d say. You’re really a frood dude who knows where his towel is finger guns
Thanks, but lately I feel more “Oh no, not again”…
It really sounds like something that Mr. Pin and Mr. Tulip heard from a guild member in The Truth, but I can’t find the reference exactly.
Addendum, The establishment known as ‘The Bucket’ on Gleam street is considered a police station for the purposes of this punch card.
I hope the thief has his licence ready, otherwise the guild hall is getting a new weather vane.
Where I’m from, we strung 'em up by the bura’zak-ka.