• @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    55
    edit-2
    8 days ago

    The Cabinet list so far, as it was officially leaked moments ago on NudeAfrica.com:

    State - Matt Gaetz

    Treasury - Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino

    Interior - A t-shirt cannon

    Justice - DraftKings®

    Agriculture - owner of that McDonald’s

    Commerce - currently accepting bids

    Labor - Immortan Joe

    Defense - Vladimir Putin

    Housing and Urban Development - it’s Trump, so probably Herschel Walker, ffs

    Transportation - Elon Musk’s twitter account

    Energy - V. Putin

    Health and Human Services - sold off and privatized between Nestlé, Saudi Aramco, and Ticketmaster

    Education - Kid Rock, Marjorie Taylor-Greene, and Lauren Boebert, and all sewn together as a human centipede

    Veterans’ Affairs - Captain Morgan; under secretaries Jack Daniels and Jim Beam

    Homeland Security - Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, once the check clears

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      English
      217 days ago

      Satire is dead. I earnestly predict at least one more pick on this list proves actually true.

    • @beebarfbadger
      link
      98 days ago

      The Onion writers: “Let’s go with this one, the real picks are too over the top.”

    • @Tujio
      link
      48 days ago

      Matt “Pizza” Gaetz

      Kristi “Ol Yeller” Noem

    • @PriorityMotif
      link
      28 days ago

      Housing and urban development will probably be that guy who owns Monarch real estate investment. Large scale slumlord.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        English
        27 days ago

        Poor Camacho gets shit for being thick, but when the world’s smartest man turned up he asked his advice gave him a job. Eventually.

        • @[email protected]
          link
          fedilink
          English
          17 days ago

          That is a very valid point. He had the strength to yield. The problem with our real world Camacho is he’s too weak to do that.