• work is slow
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      254 days ago

      The post shows a woman talking about how she was told her strong personality could make men insecure.

      • @[email protected]
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        4 days ago

        No it doesn’t. It shows a woman imagining things that weren’t said, which is then responded to with an anecdote.

        edit: Yeah I guess I’m wrong here. The second post does talk about that. Still, I don’t think ‘A man likes to feel like a man’ implies anyone needs to do anything to accommodate.

        • work is slow
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          84 days ago

          Literally couldn’t read two posts

          Still, I don’t think

    • @[email protected]
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      64 days ago

      how is that implied by ‘a man likes to feel like a man’?

      What’s the context that you’re imagining this topic coming up? Because from my perspective, as a man, if someone said this to me about someone else I’d assume that I’m being asked to come up with some made up work, so that some junior guy on my team, or some dude in my social group who is feeling down, can feel more useful.

      Which I might or might not accommodate, but it’s kinda patronizing and would effectively have the opposite effect in building up my respect for that man.

      • @[email protected]
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        24 days ago

        I’m not imagining any context, I am taking the statement at face value. I am a man, and I like to behave in a way that makes me feel like it. Like mentioned elsewhere in this thread, that means feeling useful, it means being relied upon by others, it means honouring the responsibilities I have towards others.

        • @jumperalex
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          13 days ago

          But you need to imagine a context, or there’s no conversation to be had because it makes now sense in a vacuum. In what world does anyone just say something like, “A man likes to feel like a man” without context?

          You provided your own context which generally is about what you do for yourself. Though I’m slightly skeptical that you choose to do those things specifically in the context of “today I want to do something for myself that makes me feel like a man”. You just do the things you like; full stop. But if I’m wrong, you do you, no judgement or kink-shaming ;-) I kid!

          So in the more general context of debating what it means when someone says “A man likes to feel like a man” you have to wonder what drove them to say it and to whom. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume it was said in response to someone doing/not doing, or approving/disapproving of something the speaker associates with feeling like a man. And with that very generic context one has to ask, why is it someone else’s responsibility to do/not do something to make someone feel like a man? And why does anyone’s approval/disapproval impact someone else’s sense of masculinity?

          As for feeling useful, being relied upon, honouring responsibilities, how are those traits of being a man? I ask that in the context of, how are they not just traits of a good person. When someone doesn’t do those things that doesn’t make them not a man, it makes them not a good person full stop.

        • Maeve
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          -14 days ago

          Hit dog yelps. *

          *Autocorrect is the bane of online existence