• @andros_rex
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    96 hours ago

    I think it’s reasonable to ask why bottoming is presented as inherently degrading/submissive. (Same with giving oral - the insult “cocksucker.”) The vast majority of gay men I know are mostly verse anyway, the distinction of top and bottom to some extent seems like a carryover from heterosexual culture.

    Like yes, it’s just a meme, but it’s revealing of larger problematic attitudes. I’ve made the same kinds of jokes too, but there would be nothing worse about Trump were he to receive anal sex from Musk (as unpleasant as that image is.)

    • @[email protected]
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      23 hours ago

      Just a take look at history and how it all worked back in the Antiquity/Rome, which half the Internet likes to celebrate as gay friendly. It’s fairly ingrained in European culture/history.

      • @andros_rex
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        22 hours ago

        The “Nazi femboy” phenomenon seems to harken back to that. Patriarchal structures aren’t undermined as long as the receptive partner is submissive/feminine.

    • @enbyecho
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      15 hours ago

      I think it’s reasonable to ask why bottoming is presented as inherently degrading/submissive.

      Yes, it is. But it’s up to the bottom to decide how they wish to be represented. Not for some self-appointed language police on the internet to decide for them. Among people I know there is a wide variety of attitudes about this but it’s absolutely universal that top/bottom/switch (or verse as you say) is indeed a power dynamic (that’s kinda the point for many) but only in that moment. It’s not a reflection of inferiority or weakness and it’s funny to me that people would think that. Makes me think they haven’t ever been involved in any type of BDSM activities.

      Like yes, it’s just a meme, but it’s revealing of larger problematic attitudes.

      Who gets to decide what attitudes are “problematic”?

      • @andros_rex
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        55 hours ago

        I spent almost a decade of my life in TPE. Please do not lecture me about BDSM.

        The acts themselves are not inherently submissive, and most kinksters I knew were uncomfortable with that suggestion.

        I am deciding to express my discomfort with the terminology - that’s a decision I can make. I am a bottom, and submissive even! But I could also present the activity as dominant - in that I am lying back and expecting someone to provide me with pleasure. I have even “topped” individuals in a submissive way.

        The meme is clearly presenting receptive anal sex as inherently degrading, which is a common narrative.

        • @enbyecho
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          -13 hours ago

          Who’s lecturing you? How are you being lectured?

          At least we seem to agree. I’d have taken that as the opposite of a lecture. But hey, whatevs.