Judge Juan Merchan made a second high-profile ruling earlier today when he gave 17-year-old Shawn Thomas, tried as an adult, life in prison without the possibility of parole after the teenager was found guilty of making hush money payments to adult film star Stormy Daniels.
  • OmnipitaphEnglish
    37•2 months ago

    “The nature of your crimes and abuse of power displayed in covering them up represents an unforgivable betrayal of the public trust and indicates a total impossibility of reform,” declared Merchan during the sentencing. “It has been proven beyond doubt that you offered Ms. Daniels $40 and some Burger King to keep your tryst ‘on the DL,’ so as not to jeopardize your chances of a shift supervisor promotion and $2 per hour raise at an Amazon warehouse. It is my hope that this sentencing will show the American people that such a lack of ethics will not be tolerated in the lower-mid echelons of our nation’s great privatized shipping and receiving companies, may God have mercy on your soul.”

    Is this a parody site? There is no way this kid is going to prison for life over 40 bucks and some burger king.

      • OmnipitaphEnglish
        7•2 months ago

        Thank you. This is not the kind of thing I thought I’d be having trouble telling truth from fiction about in 2025.

    • @MaggotyEnglish
      13•2 months ago

      The quote from Judge Merchan is real.

      Right before he declared a sentence of no punishment, no conditions, for Trump.

    • @werefreeatlastEnglish
      6•2 months ago

      Time served you honor! He’s kicked off a campaign for president and has got 3 votes!

    • @shalafiEnglish
      3•2 months ago

      I believed it up till the last two words, and even then…