Honestly, I always felt the same way when I was younger. People would just meet up and fuck, like a fun thing, and I was never that into it. I thought something was wrong with me that I didn’t get it, until I started spending time with girls I had a real-life connection with, and then it was magic.
Pop culture lied to me. The club is bullshit. Casual sex is an awkward wasteland. Props if you’re into it I guess, but somehow young adult America turned it into the default, when it’s not the way.
Thing is, there is not a “way”. Some people enjoy casual sex, some yearns for a deeper connection, some don’t like sex at all. It varies depending on people, sexual preferences, mood, age, etc.
I don’t like the “they lied to me” mentality. Brother, they didn’t lie, it’s just not for you right now, and maybe never. You just need to find your way.
It is quite far from the default. That’s just a perception issue. Most young adults aren’t even having sex much less casual sex. Like sure tinder exists but it is primarily a fwb generator, not a meet someone new to fuck every day (at least for most people).
Capitalism turned it into default by turning dating into a catalogue you could surf from your couch instead of building meaningful connections with people.
Honestly, I always felt the same way when I was younger. People would just meet up and fuck, like a fun thing, and I was never that into it. I thought something was wrong with me that I didn’t get it, until I started spending time with girls I had a real-life connection with, and then it was magic.
Pop culture lied to me. The club is bullshit. Casual sex is an awkward wasteland. Props if you’re into it I guess, but somehow young adult America turned it into the default, when it’s not the way.
Thing is, there is not a “way”. Some people enjoy casual sex, some yearns for a deeper connection, some don’t like sex at all. It varies depending on people, sexual preferences, mood, age, etc.
I don’t like the “they lied to me” mentality. Brother, they didn’t lie, it’s just not for you right now, and maybe never. You just need to find your way.
I’ve known people who’ve wondered if they were asexual because of this, then later realized that pop culture isn’t real life.
It is quite far from the default. That’s just a perception issue. Most young adults aren’t even having sex much less casual sex. Like sure tinder exists but it is primarily a fwb generator, not a meet someone new to fuck every day (at least for most people).
Capitalism turned it into default by turning dating into a catalogue you could surf from your couch instead of building meaningful connections with people.
In the name of profit
It’s the same way in europe, I hate it.
Maybe Helen Fisher’s work could be of interest to you
https://youtu.be/6wT61wsgfk0