Some woman I never met told me point blank at the gym that I should pray more. After staring at her in disbelief for ten solid seconds, she told me I had a disability because I had sinned. Obviously.
So I asked her why I should pray a God that disabled me: she told me God loved me and had a plan for me. Tough love I guess. But hey, if there’s a plan…
Then I asked her if my limbs would grow back if I prayed enough: no she said, but it’s not too late to let Jesus into my life.
Well that made total sense. I’m off to church then…
“shoulda started masturbating right there. commenting, ‘this is how we pray to biggusdickus’, or something.”
<reads “arms grow back”>
Shit.
In any case, yeah. it always amazes me the logic behind prayer, and how everything bad is your fault because “sin”… but everything good is because god did something. they can’t say what. but, you got that promotion because of god. you’re still alive. cuz god. you’re kids got a’s. cuz god. it has absolutely nothing to do with hardwork and taking care of yourself, none at all. it’s all god. unless its bad. then it’s definitely your fault.
You think thats funny?
Wait until biggusdickus hears about this.
With 15 other people in the gym room, I don’t think so. But amusing thought nonetheless 🙂
It’s communion!
Why? Are you shy or something? 🙂