I’m fairly new to all of this. I started questioning 3-4 weeks ago and feel like I’m kind of figuring some things out in my mind, but also like I’m at a roadblock or a fork in the road. I feel like to see where I need/want to go next, I need to explore, but I don’t know how. I’ve heard about playing a game or whatever online and use a different identity, but it’d be hard to cram another game in enough for that to feel useful. I could try on some clothes, but that feels so limited in what it tells me. I’m sure it could be related to the fact that over time I have been convincing myself there’s not boy/girl clothes, they’re just fabric anyone can buy. (I think some of this came to be when my first child was conceived and we specifically avoided gendering kids things) Maybe I’m just looking for a way to get confirmation about what I think I’m feeling?

When you were discovering yourself, what did your journey look like? What do I do? Do you have any advice?

I’m open (and less panicked) about the ideas of some identity possibilities, but still when I think deeply, “how do I really feel about myself?” I just feel kind of empty, or a void. Any advice or guidance at all would be super helpful and much appreciated!

🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

  • Vlaxtocia [she/her]
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    21 year ago

    You’re not alone, I’ve started seriously questioning recently and it’s scary AF! I’m on the wait list for some counselling through my local LGBT center, it might be worth looking into whether that’s a possibility for you? I want it so I can have someone impartial help me sort through my thoughts and feelings. I’m currently NB and I’ve been slowly exploring being a little more feminine in attitude, but I’m balding and hairy AF so presenting femme doesn’t feel like an option.

    • @[email protected]OP
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      41 year ago

      I do have an appointment with a therapist scheduled and I’m not sure how different it will be since they’re not from an LGBT center, they have told me they’re on a journey as well, so I’m hopeful.

      You might be interested in this post if you haven’t seen it. I had heard of some of those products but had always assumed they didn’t work, but apparently they can work really well, and the derma roller sounds very interesting and promising as well.

      I started the Sam’s club brand Rogaine recently and while I can’t say it’s been long enough to judge efficacy, it was $20 to get a 6 month supply mailed to me, which is pretty good. I’m seriously considering the derma roller too since it can be used to promote some healing in the skin and reduce wrinkles.

      As for the body hair, I’m in the exact same boat. Hairiest person I know. I am considering my luck with some removal cream though.

      Issue is, it’s still summer and that will draw attention and questions from relatives and I’m not ready for that yet.

      • Vlaxtocia [she/her]
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        31 year ago

        Thanks for the link, I’m already on finasteride but I’ll take a look into micro-needling too. Let me know how the hair removal cream goes though! The only thing I thought would do it would be laser removal but that shit’s expensive! Man talking about this like it’s real is scary

        • @[email protected]OP
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          31 year ago

          Right? Terrifyingly excited too.

          I have used some extra sentive(I forget what it’s called, veet with gray label I think) on an extra sensitive area when I had a procedure done and it wasn’t too bad other than I did it in sections and wasn’t careful enough not to overlap and those areas were pretty sore for a few days. Other than that, it got a lot of it and there was very little left to shave after that. Also, I don’t remember it being itchy, or at least not that itchy coming back in.