Ok, I have no idea why this bothers me and I don’t even know what to call it. My husband is a “come here” guy. Something he thinks is interesting and wants to show me - hey, come here! Nuclear apocalypse - hey, come here! Why the hell wont he just tell me why he wants me to get up, trudge to wherever he is, so that he can reveal the surprise like some sort of performative art ? I never know if it’s going to be legitimate, a disaster, or something stupid. The walk to wherever he is is insanely stressful because the whole time I’m running through all possible horrible scenarios (we’ve had a lot of issues at the house lately so I never know if I’m going to find water in the basement or raccoons in the attic or a hole in my foundation, or just him looking at a funny cat video). I’d rather he say “hey, babe, something is happening wherever/whatever, come see this.” Instead I have to have the whole performance and reveal and I fucking hate it. Anyone else know what I’m talking about or am I just mental ?
This sounds like a you problem that can only be resolved by talking to him about it. Maybe a counselor or therapist if necessary.
Yeah, kinda sounds like the husband may just be unaware of what’s ticking OP off. Even if they show displeasure, if they don’t properly verbalize it, they may just be annoyed at the subject matter, rather than how the husband is calling them.
Some people, like me, are daft as hell and need some things to be spelled out for them.
as a boyfriend i talk like this too, i don’t think my girlfriend bothers, but i never thought about it, yes, she need to talk to him cos he never gonna know
Oh no I have verbalized it. He acknowledges it’s inappropriate and keeping me in unnecessary suspense. But he doesn’t know why he does it so … shrug. He even apologized for it last night as soon as i said something about it (raccoons just sitting on the roof). It was 1am and I was dead asleep and he called me on my phone to wake me to come outside right away and see this. A 1am urgent call from outside the house when I’m dead asleep should be about someone being dead, not “there are two raccoons sitting on the roof of our sunroom.”
totally unforgivable. i would absolutely not stand for what you’ve described.
i have read all of your responses herein and i keep thinking how glad i am to not be married.