We have to accept that just like any other medical procedure, sometimes therapy isn’t successful, or does not work out the way that we want or expect. Complications exist, and even if they didn’t, people aren’t a monolith. Nobody responds to therapy the exact same way.
So, I’ll ask the question. What does working through this in a healthy way look like?
I certainly don’t disagree, but the OP’s screenshot shows people expressing the idea that psychologists are wrong to “pathologise anger” (which I read as “to think that anger normally subsides several years after the initial event, and to want to take steps to reduce it”).
I don’t know what “this” is in your question, but I don’t think I will be able to answer it usefully regardless of what you mean.
“This” was meant to be a direct question about the person in the original post’s anger and grief.
But I do think the therapist is actively making things worse by expressing this medical opinion this way to the person in question. It’s clear to me that they view this as a chemical imbalance of some kind (and as a result may be trying to push drugs on this person). But this persons anger and grief are valid, and I have found that a lot of drugs just paper over the cracks instead of working toward an understanding that the world is wrong and we do the best we can. This person is self aware. They recognize their anger. They know why they are angry. They understand that other people might have let it go, and they seem to even to some extent understand why they can’t. They are actively seeking therapy and help.
I’m contrast, this therapist has expressed that something is wrong with them for being angry. In a society where we are constantly told anger basically isn’t allowed. And the triggering events for this person are front and center most of the time. They don’t get to have the space to distance themselves.
So while I can agree that anger and grief shouldn’t be your personality and you should deal with your emotions and trauma as constructively as you can, I don’t agree that because you happen to fall outside the norm to remain angry or to express it.
I may be reading a lot into what was said in the original post. But lots of other comments here seem to have hit the nail on the head.
When society fails you and continues to pretend it didn’t, that causes what’s called generational trauma. The medical community fully acknowledges that this is a real phenomemon.
So, does “healthy healing” mean op can no longer be angry?
I think you’re looking at the stages of grief and relying on that to inform you about this post without thinking about the fact that this isn’t just about grief. This is also about societal failure.
But I do think the therapist is actively making things worse by expressing this medical opinion this way to the person in question
We’ve got a single quote made up of two words filtered through one person’s complaint. You can take that fully at face value if you like, but I think that’s remarkably naive.
I think you’re looking at the stages of grief and relying on that to inform you about this post without thinking about the fact that this isn’t just about grief. This is also about societal failure.
The “stages of grief” are bullshit so I’m not relying on that for anything.
We have to accept that just like any other medical procedure, sometimes therapy isn’t successful, or does not work out the way that we want or expect. Complications exist, and even if they didn’t, people aren’t a monolith. Nobody responds to therapy the exact same way.
So, I’ll ask the question. What does working through this in a healthy way look like?
I certainly don’t disagree, but the OP’s screenshot shows people expressing the idea that psychologists are wrong to “pathologise anger” (which I read as “to think that anger normally subsides several years after the initial event, and to want to take steps to reduce it”).
I don’t know what “this” is in your question, but I don’t think I will be able to answer it usefully regardless of what you mean.
“This” was meant to be a direct question about the person in the original post’s anger and grief.
But I do think the therapist is actively making things worse by expressing this medical opinion this way to the person in question. It’s clear to me that they view this as a chemical imbalance of some kind (and as a result may be trying to push drugs on this person). But this persons anger and grief are valid, and I have found that a lot of drugs just paper over the cracks instead of working toward an understanding that the world is wrong and we do the best we can. This person is self aware. They recognize their anger. They know why they are angry. They understand that other people might have let it go, and they seem to even to some extent understand why they can’t. They are actively seeking therapy and help.
I’m contrast, this therapist has expressed that something is wrong with them for being angry. In a society where we are constantly told anger basically isn’t allowed. And the triggering events for this person are front and center most of the time. They don’t get to have the space to distance themselves.
So while I can agree that anger and grief shouldn’t be your personality and you should deal with your emotions and trauma as constructively as you can, I don’t agree that because you happen to fall outside the norm to remain angry or to express it.
I may be reading a lot into what was said in the original post. But lots of other comments here seem to have hit the nail on the head.
When society fails you and continues to pretend it didn’t, that causes what’s called generational trauma. The medical community fully acknowledges that this is a real phenomemon.
So, does “healthy healing” mean op can no longer be angry?
I think you’re looking at the stages of grief and relying on that to inform you about this post without thinking about the fact that this isn’t just about grief. This is also about societal failure.
We’ve got a single quote made up of two words filtered through one person’s complaint. You can take that fully at face value if you like, but I think that’s remarkably naive.
The “stages of grief” are bullshit so I’m not relying on that for anything.