Also going through a divorce. As the “man”, I ended up earning the lion’s share of the money and doing all the “hard work” throughout the relationship. This was because I put in hundreds of extra hours into my career both on the clock and off. I literally went out and faced extreme discomfort, worked jobs that most people would never even consider, and tried my best to be loving and supportive while doing around half of the house work, and basically all of the exterior/automotive work. My spouse was happy to work her chill government job and go to cross-fit to hang out with her friends and work on herself. She had to make dinner occasionally and mop the house sometimes, as I froze my ass off in the cold for weeks on end, and spent an extra 20 or so hours in my car per month just to be with her more frequently. I encouraged her to pursue better job prospects, but she never did. Now she gets around half of everything, objectively benefiting from my hard work while she got to relatively relax.

This is why I am against alimony and am for equal gender rights, except for extreme circumstances such as children or disability. Otherwise, it was probably the “other” spouse’s choice to sit around and do less.