I experienced a gay sauna for the first time a couple of days ago. I was anxious for a few minutes, until I got a feel for the place and let my towel expose me a bit. I had two encounters and both were fantastic. (If you’re following my previous post, I’m in the very beginning stages still…) However, both times, my partner expected kissing, naturally. But I have always had an aversion to tongues and kissing in general. This confirmed it. Interlocking tongues with another human is not my thing. It feels disgusting and I was cringing a bit during that part. (I say this but I was the bottom…) I felt strange saying that I don’t kiss, but maybe that’s acceptable just like any other boundary. I am wondering, though, if it is possible to get over it.
Human sexuality is a complex thing. I’m pan, and I’ve been with my share of guys over the years (I am a guy). Am not going to get into the weeds but suffice to say, I’ve done all sorts of things with guys, however kissing is something that I don’t tend to, because I find the sensation of kissing stubble or a beard unpleasant, and asking someone to shave directly before they kiss me seems unreasonable!
So I’d say if you straight up find it unpleasant, that’s probably not likely to become finding it pleasant via repeated exposure. Just my opinion of course. You can always be straight up with people and say “I’m not into this, I’d rather we did x instead” and it’s their call if they’re happy with that or not.