I have asked this question to countless people (mostly in hair salons) as an alternative to small talk, and it always yields interesting results.

Rules:

  • You get the money right now, right where you are. If it’s 10pm and you’re in the middle of nowhere, your money will still go poof at 11pm.
  • As a result of the above, tell us what time it is and roughly where you are (big city, desert, small town, …)
  • You must spend the money. You cannot give it to someone to hold on to it for you for a while.
  • Normal world rules apply, e.g. you cannot buy a $250k car at a dealership in 1h in cash, and you cannot buy a house in 1h either.
  • Remember that getting from where you are to the place you need to go takes time. Factor that in!

Edit: I’m glad you guys had fun with this one. Feel free to post similar hypothetical questions. I kinda like these.

Edit edit: Free advertising 😅 --> I run and maintain an open source push notification service called ntfy, which let’s you send notifications to your phone via PUT/POST, like curl -d "backup successful" ntfy.sh/mytopic. Go check it out.

  • @[email protected]English
    1•1 year ago

    If counting the money was a problem to overcome intended by OP, they would’ve mentioned it. For the sake of the post’s intent I think it’s safe to assume the money is in large bills, which can be counted very quickly by a machine. Add to that that I can just use an ATM at the front of my bank, and things are much more fast and automatic.

    Once it’s in my account, it’s in my account and I can use it right away

    • @[email protected]English
      1•1 year ago

      On money counting…
      Well, $500 and $1000 bill was discontinued in 1969.
      So, if you are dealing with those bills, you are dealing with collectors who will be more particular.
      So, let’s got with $100 bills.
      Googling “fastest bill counter” gives the “JetScan iFX i100” which can do 1600 bills per minute.
      Which is only 6.25 minutes for $1M in $100 bills.
      And it had counterfeit detection.
      Honestly, that’s a hell of a lot faster than I expected.
      If the bank has/uses automated machines for customer deposits.

      Anyway, I don’t think a bank would accept a $1M deposit.
      Any deposits over $10,000 require special processing by the IRS.
      Indeed, all financial institutions need to abide by “know your customer” rules.
      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Know_your_customer

      If you are a regular banker than has a $50k salary and you rock up with $1M cash, a bank is going to refuse you. Or at least do a hell of a lot of due-diligence.
      It’s all about anti-laundering and anti-terrorism these days, and they need to manage the risk of having you as a customer.
      If you have a history of big cash deposits, then it might be easier.

      Even then, chances are you would have to go to a fairly major branch of a bank for them to be able to accept the risk of holding $1M in cash.

      I know modern banking is “Money in, money out. So easy”.
      But beyond certain thresholds, risk management, government agencies and laws all come into effect. And you can bet your ass, a bank will be wanting to minimise their risk!