• Willie
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    431 year ago

    I’d get the fourth sword, then I’d take a regular dagger, and cut open a pregnant cow or cat or dog or something. I’d then slay all the kittens or calves or puppies with my new sword. Since the animals are not born yet, they would have an age of less than 0. When we add their negative age to mine, I’d become weeks or even months younger per kill! With this I will have everlasting youth!

    • ipodjockey
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      231 year ago

      Well this is the most reddit like thing I’ve seen on Lemmy so far…

        • ipodjockey
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          61 year ago

          You may want to see a therapist.

          • Willie
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            21 year ago

            Nah, I’m completely fine. I was only trying to find a way to get the most benefit from the four choices given in the post. We don’t live in a world with magic, so I don’t see myself ever doing anything like that.

            Thanks for your concern though.

    • BigFigOPM
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      151 year ago

      …you’re a strange one

      • Willie
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        31 year ago

        Am I really so strange? There are tales as old as time itself where powerful people seek everlasting life, and they are willing to commit far worse atrocities to reach their goals. For me the price is merely the lives of a few barnyard animals, common livestock that would have died for the goals of man anyway! This is no different than you eating a meal.

        Is the amount of food that would barely feed a small army really such a high price to pay for a longer healthier life? I think not!

    • @Piemanding
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      111 year ago

      Or just hire someone to stab you with the sword a couple times. There’s bound to be some poor people who’d do it for a bit of gold.

      • Willie
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        41 year ago

        Impressive, you had a more evil response than mine!

        I feel like the chances of you getting a drunk or some sort of criminal who decides to kill you all the way with the sword and take all of your gold while not knowing what the sword does would eventually end up killing you, though. It’s even possible that there’s nothing nefarious behind it too, they just happen to stab you in the right way where you end up bleeding out or something.

        Or maybe, some poor men’s wives would appear and hunt you down. Angry that you somehow stole something from them when they already had nothing. After stealing their husbands’ youths, they’re now out for blood! I dunno, haha.

    • @PoetSII
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      81 year ago

      What a terrible day to be literate

    • @SgtAStrawberry
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      21 year ago

      Do elephants or whales instead or even alpacas, you get much more time from them.

    • @[email protected]
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      11 year ago

      My dude over here make omelets with a sword. Also, why does he always look so amazing. Its like he doesn’t age or something!