spaf @spaf

Every vendor booth at RSA this year: Powered by world-class Al with a proprietary language model, our product offers unbelievably agile, next-gen threat intelligence-based risk management in the dark net on a quantum containerized blockchain employing breathtakingly advanced data science. Built to be compatible with your SIEM & cloud, its zero-trust architecture is programmed in a memory-safe language with no supply chain to monitor!

  • @[email protected]
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    557 months ago

    its zero-trust architecture is programmed in a memory-safe language with no supply chain to monitor!

    this is good.

    • @Hasherm0n
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      297 months ago

      They’re fully vertically integrated from the silicone through the compiler, os, and all software running.

        • @[email protected]
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          127 months ago

          To be fair smart connected chastity cages did get hacked recently so their owners couldn’t get them off.

          • @Randelung
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            87 months ago

            And some of them did get off on that.

        • @Hasherm0n
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          97 months ago

          Ah shit, serves me right for posting off the cuff…

          Though that is also a thing.

          • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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            27 months ago

            Don’t sweat it too much, I think most people struggle with silicon vs silicone. Silicon is the hard stuff used in computer chips, silicone is the soft stuff used in sex toys and boob implants.

            A few mnemonic devices that might help you remember which is which:

            • SiliCON is a semi-CONductor, silicone is not.

            • (expanded version of the previous) SiliCON is very CONventient when used in computers due to its properties as a semi-CONductor.

            • Madonna has silly cones.

            On the last one, I have no idea if Madonna has breast implants or not, and quite frankly I don’t really care. However, I do know that she has/had a fairly infamous outfit that included a cone-shaped bra. As such, the train of thought goes silicone -> silly cone(s) -> Madonna had silly cones -> breasts -> breast implants.

    • @MycelialMass
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      157 months ago

      And it comes with a free gogurt!

      • @MotoAsh
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        117 months ago

        The others make sense if you drop the extra extra buzz words. Like quantum. Containers exist, the block chain exists, I wouldn’t be surprised if some idiot combined those. Though quantum computing … is not related to normal computing.