I honestly don’t think the man has a grand plan. I think he “officially” ran for president partly to step up donations, partly to throw a wrench in the inevitable prosecutions he was facing last fall, and partly just to do something random to stay in the press.

Choking on a hamburder would solve a lot of problems, but I expect one of his creditors will buy off his kids to smother him with a pillow. Trump has done dirt with some shady people, and if Trump was facing jail time, God only knows what sort of embarrassing stories he might tell. I’ve been expecting Putin to send Trump a pallet of novichok Diet Coke for two years now.