• SokathHisEyesOpen
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    3411 months ago

    Isn’t Santa omniscient? He should already know where the presents are, so he must be a sadist.

    • @[email protected]
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      11 months ago

      Santa isn’t omniscient. He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. We can infer from this phrasing that he can’t see you when you’re awake. He also knows if you’ve been bad or good but that information isn’t as specific.

      • swab148
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        1711 months ago

        What if I upload my consciousness to the internet, then ran that through a VPN and Tor and iP2P and all that, think I could shake him?

        • SokathHisEyesOpen
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          511 months ago

          You can’t even shake Facebook or Google that way. How do you expect it to work against a demi-god?

          • swab148
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            311 months ago

            I think we’re discussing the limitations of a fictional being. In the context of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”, I’m not sure his powers apply to the internet, being that “He sees you when you’re sleeping…”, but he only “… knows when you’re awake.” So if my incorporeal consciousness was uploaded to the internet, do you think I could spoof my online status to green, so that I’d be untraceable to Santa?

            • SokathHisEyesOpen
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              311 months ago

              Possibly. I have seen many drawings depicting Santa being threatened by technology.

              • swab148
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                311 months ago

                If we’re building a thing, I don’t think Krampus would be as limited, but his punishment wouldn’t be as dire.

        • @EdibleFriend
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          411 months ago

          Only if, the moment you get uploaded, you say ‘I’m in.’

          • swab148
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            111 months ago

            My online consciousness will 100% be wearing 1337 h4x0r sunglasses

        • @agent_flounder
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          411 months ago

          Idk I bet he’s got contacts all throughout the NSA. He’s got a hell of a blackmailing racket going.

          • swab148
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            211 months ago

            Or maybe part of his elf crew includes an elite hacking division, and he’s essentially in every government network.

      • @psud
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        11 months ago

        I reckon he knows if you’ve been bad or good because of the parents’ assessment of their children’s goodness. That is not a specific Santa power, except in as much as the power of Santa to get that parental assessment is a power

        I think it has to be based on the parents, as clearly bad kids still get presents, and only their mother thinks they’re good.

      • @aeronmelon
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        211 months ago

        Our subconsciousness dreams Santa into existence.

    • @c24w
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      2911 months ago

      He lacks omnipresents!

    • The Menemen!
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      211 months ago

      Santa only watches children though I think.

  • BlanketsWithSmallpox
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    11 months ago

    Be the Grinch. Get ostracized by looking different. Slowly get shunned from your community and froze out. Be ignored. Everyone hates you for no reason.

    They rub it in your face by being as loud and noisy as possible. You tried to get away but they still flaunt it in your face. Only your best doggo understands and loves you still.

    You go down and try to stop it and take their shit. Next day, they’re still singing their fucking songs. You give them their shit back and NOW they like you.

    Lesson: Nobody will like you until it looks like you did something good. Even if it was just a problem you made and you fixed but nothing actually changes.

    • @tuck182
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      111 months ago

      Maybe that’s one of the elves?

  • @aeronmelon
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    1211 months ago

    Gordon: “Which one are you going after?”

    Santa: “MRS. CLAUS!”

    Gordon, to his officers: “We’re going after Rudolph!”

  • @Daft_ish
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    911 months ago

    Driving around this year looking at lights, the grinch is way over represented.

  • Dr. Coomer
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    611 months ago

    “You’ll never get it out of me, you jolly basterd.”

    • The Picard ManeuverOP
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      711 months ago

      Safely Endangered is a pretty popular webcomic, so I highly doubt it’s AI, but I guess a lot of the styles we see are becoming sort of similar.