The Chief’s federal judiciary’s year-end report may as well have been generated by ChatGPT.

For Chief Justice Roberts, the Year-End Report on the Federal Judiciary is no longer a serious assessment of the state of the federal courts as much as it’s a taxpayer-funded blog post for him to express his disdain for the American people.

You might suspect that the design of an annual report of the federal judiciary would involve providing the American people with some sense that the Chief Justice of the United States grasps the issues facing the courts and, ideally, has some sort of plan for addressing them. After all, that’s the whole point of any annual report: to provide stakeholders with a sense of the successes and challenges facing an entity. It’s why a corporate 10-K can’t just decline to mention that the CEO is now wanted by Interpol.

While the federal judiciary in 2023 found itself beset by ethical scandals from top to bottom, jurists abandoning any sense of professionalism and decorum, a forum shopping crisis spawned by the lack of reform to the nationwide injunction procedure, and a criminal defendant openly attacking the judicial process and inspiring violent threats against federal judges, John Roberts addressed… none of these.

  • Flying Squid
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    936 months ago

    As 2023 draws to a close with breathless predictions about the future of Artificial Intelligence, some may wonder whether judges are about to become obsolete.

    Jesus Fucking Christ. He’s worried about job security because of robots? Keep going the way SCOTUS is going and he should be worried about job security because of an angry mob.

    You know who should be worried about job security because of automation? Not judges. A lot of people, but not judges.

    • @[email protected]
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      76 months ago

      Doctors, lawyers, and judges are positions I cannot wait for (properly functioning) AI to fill.

      • Flying Squid
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        116 months ago

        I don’t know that I would want to completely remove the element from any of those jobs, especially doctor. An AI doesn’t really understand what pain is. But I would be in favor of a hybrid AI/human job for any of those.

        • @[email protected]
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          -96 months ago

          Have you met doctors? Their personality type is the closest to robots we have. They spend years in misery memorizing things, yet when they become doctors they need to learn “bedside manner”

          • @[email protected]
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            156 months ago

            My doctors are all excellent. They make me feel like a somewhat valuable human for a few minutes a month.

          • Flying Squid
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            6 months ago

            I’ve been dealing with a serious mystery medical issue for months now and also have a bad nerve disorder and, aside from one case, I have had very good experience with my many doctors, who have all had an excellent bedside manner even when they were unable to help me in the end. The people in the medical industry in the U.S. who are not great at dealing with people are the people who didn’t go to medical school, like at the registration desk. They’re paid shit and are sick of their jobs and have to deal with terrible people all day and I don’t blame them. And doctors and nurses have to deal with terrible people all day too, which is why I am actually pretty impressed by how caring everyone has been.

            While waiting in the bed to get my gallbladder removed at the end of last month, I had to listen to some lady whine and complain to literally every person that came into her pre-op area across from mine, everyone from the intake person to the surgeon, and bitching to her husband the rest of the time. And, of course, regularly pressing the call button. I pressed it twice. Once to go to the bathroom and once because my IV bag was getting empty because someone accidentally made it drip too quickly.

            And wow are there some shitty healthcare jobs. A guy came in to shave my whole stomach with clippers, which took a good 10 minutes because I’m fairly hirsute. Then I listened to him in another waiting area shaving some guy who must have been Robin Williams’ stunt double because the guy was still doing it when I left for surgery and he started like 45 minutes beforehand. Imagine being the guy who has to shave everyone before surgery. And even he was really nice.

            • @[email protected]
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              36 months ago

              They’re paid shit and are sick of their jobs and have to deal with terrible people all day and I don’t blame them. And doctors and nurses have to deal with terrible people all day too, which is why I am actually pretty impressed by how caring everyone has been.

              That’s a big reason I would like to see them replaced by AI. Humans can’t help but be affected by that kind of stuff; AI shouldn’t be. Prejudices and preconceived notions come with the human element and are not something easily fixed. AI shouldn’t have this issue. No, AI doesn’t have any concept of pain other than what it’s been taught; but I’m not sure many of these privileged, silver spoon doctors do either.

              I’m aware that humans are the ones programming the AI and are likely to bake in their own prejudices and opinions, but that’s also why any publicly facing AI like that should be able to be audited by anyone to see exactly why it makes the decisions it does. That way the baked in human element can hopefully be weeded out.

              • Flying Squid
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                46 months ago

                Sorry… you think doctors have never felt physical pain because of their privilege?

                • @[email protected]
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                  26 months ago

                  The same as someone living under the poverty line? No, I don’t. But that is by far the tiniest part of the reason I feel they should be replaced.

      • @jacksilver
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        26 months ago

        This is literally a list of jobs that should always have the human element (well maybe not doctors).

  • @ChicoSuave
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    426 months ago

    The public has contempt for John Roberts as well. It’s mutual. He’ll get his karma.

    • @APassenger
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      186 months ago

      I’m reasonably confident that karma is in history books after he dies. Until then, he’s likely Chief Justice over a court packed with people agreeing with him.

      Especially if this next election goes a certain way.

    • Neato
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      66 months ago

      If by “karma” you mean continuing to be relatively popular (because he’s not really in the news), being able to enrich himself with impunity and continuing to have one of the biggest life-long power trips possible, then sure. He’s going to go down in history as a momentous judge without huge controversies simply because his shit isn’t the rankest in his court. He’ll mostly be a footnote during this period.

      • @[email protected]
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        96 months ago

        The public is more aware than ever of judicial corruption. He’ll be remembered the same as the rest of the exploiting class, of today and the robber barons a hundred years ago. The Roberts court will be synonymous with constitutional failure, proof of the failure of common law to self regulate

  • @Sanctus
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    236 months ago

    Time and time again I have to question, why do these people deserve cush lives, multiple houses, and I don’t even derserve one house? This chucklefuck is just collecting a tax payer check and fucking off. I’d be fired if I delivered a report that spoke of nothing important.

  • @rayyy
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    206 months ago

    The Supreme Court Of The United States MAGA Court For Fascists

  • Matt
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    146 months ago

    “At least at present, studies show a persistent public perception of a “human-AI fairness gap,” reflecting the view that human adjudications, for all of their flaws, are fairer than whatever the machine spits out.” I am appalled by how blithe this reads.

    • Flying Squid
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      296 months ago

      But it’s nice that he devoted valuable paragraphs of his end-of-year report to the history of the typewriter.

  • @[email protected]
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    6 months ago

    Here Roberts, I had chat gpt generate a better statement for you:

    Over the past year, the Supreme Court has faced significant criticism for rulings that have stirred controversy and eroded public trust. I must express regret for decisions related to abortion rights, where the Court’s stance has been perceived by many as regressive and infringing upon individual freedoms. The impact of these rulings on reproductive rights has been a source of concern and disappointment.

    Furthermore, the Court acknowledges the pressing issue of dark money in elections. The lack of stringent regulations has allowed for an influx of undisclosed funds, casting a shadow over the democratic process. We recognize the importance of addressing these concerns to ensure the transparency and fairness of our electoral system.

    In addition, there have been allegations of blatantly partisan rulings, devoid of a solid legal foundation, seemingly aimed at frustrating the President’s agenda. The perception of judicial decisions being driven by political motives undermines the impartiality that the judiciary should uphold. We understand the frustration and anxiety caused by such actions and pledge to reinforce the Court’s commitment to impartiality and adherence to the rule of law.

    As Chief Justice, I assure the public that these challenges have not gone unnoticed, and steps are being taken to reevaluate our processes, engage in introspection, and work towards restoring faith in the judiciary. The Court remains dedicated to upholding the principles of justice, ensuring a fair and impartial legal system for all.

    Clearly pure fiction, but one can imagine.

  • @specseaweed
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    66 months ago

    When you’re suffering from imposter syndrome or you’re wondering if you can challenge yourself to do stuff at the highest levels, remember that John Roberts is the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.

    He’s the “smart” conservative and he’s dumber than a box of shit.