• TimLovesTech (AuDHD)(he/him)
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    7110 months ago

    Having a court appointed auditor also makes it difficult for him to use laundered money (or otherwise illegal sources). He has already claimed the auditor has cost him “millions”, which isn’t a thing if you’re operating “beautifully” and above board all legal like.

    • @TropicalDingdong
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      1410 months ago

      Yeah, I mean talk about gravy.

      Thanks NY. We all owe you one.

      • Sabata11792
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        10 months ago

        “For only $9.99 a month, I can show you the hate under this robe~.”

        • @carl_dungeon
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          610 months ago

          He should do a PPV of that first episode of black mirror.

              • @Viking_Hippie
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                10 months ago

                Yeah! Just can’t enjoy some good pig fuckin’ unless you pity BOTH/ALL of them!

                …is not something I ever thought I’d say 😄

    • OhStopYellingAtMe
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      1410 months ago

      He should do a PPV broadcast of him being escorted to prison in an orange jumpsuit.

      It would easily generate all the money he’d no longer need, because he’ll be in prison.

      • @carl_dungeon
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        1210 months ago

        I’ve learned there is nothing preventing a felon or an actively incarcerated prisoner from being elected president.

        • @Num10ck
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          510 months ago

          thats so politicians don’t put their competitors in prison on trumped up charges. kinda like that Putin character, or Xi or Kim, etc.

  • @LEDZeppelin
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    4510 months ago

    Saudis and Russians will suddenly be very interested in golden sneakers

    • athos77
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      1510 months ago

      Why do you think Orban is visiting MaL? Trump is about to accidentally find money he shoved under his mattress laundered through sneakers.

      [Sneakers that aren’t even scheduled to ship for another four months, if ever. I’m really hoping his babysitter is watching this.]

        • athos77
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          410 months ago

          That fucker will cheerfully accept Russian, Saudi or Chinese money to carry a couple bags of diplomatic “cash” in and a diplomatic bag of US national secrets out - remember that Trump moved boxes before and after the FBI raid, had the boxes conveniently stored next to a copier, and the FBI didn’t search two rooms they were supposed to.

          • @model_tar_gz
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            210 months ago

            Normally I’d lament only having one upvote to give.

          • @model_tar_gz
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            210 months ago

            Normally I’d lament only having one upvote to give.

          • @model_tar_gz
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            210 months ago

            Normally I’d lament only having one upvote to give.

    • @cbarrick
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      4010 months ago

      Putin’s strapped for cash too.

      The ruble is in the toilet. All of the oligarchs’ foreign assets are frozen. The “two-week special military operation” in Ukraine has dragged on since 2022.

      • @[email protected]
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        10 months ago

        Did the Swiss banks finally stop laundering money for them?

        Or have they been running the way war mostly with Chinese loans lately?

        • @[email protected]
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          610 months ago

          Putin has been using the Russian reserves as his personal piggy bank for decades. That worked fine when Russia was able to make money hand over fist selling oil to and gas to Europe, but now he has to use the Russian financial reserves to pay for the war

        • @Dkarma
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          -1710 months ago

          Dunno but Switzerland is joining NATO…

          • @AbidanYre
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            2510 months ago

            Sweden != Switzerland

            • @Viking_Hippie
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              10 months ago

              Next you’re gonna tell me that Norway ≠ Nigeria!

              • @AbidanYre
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                710 months ago

                All I know is, I’ve never gotten an email from a Norwegian prince offering me money.

      • @IphtashuFitz
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        10 months ago

        Putin probably has billions of dollars squirreled away in banks all over the world. He’s been extorting oligarchs for huge kickbacks for decades now. If they don’t pay up they find themselves shipped to Siberia or thrown out a window.

  • @[email protected]
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    2810 months ago

    Imagine being so morally bankrupt that you’re willing to pay the legal fees of a convicted rapist so that he can go on to become Dictator For A Day™.

  • @just_change_it
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    2210 months ago

    The RNC is already gearing up to pay for him. Rob the uneducated masses (remember, we’re talking republicans here!) and pay the wealthy orange dude for his past actions before he was president, let’s go!

    • @[email protected]
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      2610 months ago

      The party only has $8 million cash on hand as of their Feb SEC filling. They can’t pay for his corporate fraud. They can’t even pay for his sexual assault. They will probably pay for some of his lawyers in the cases about stealing national secrets and trying to steal the election.

  • AutoTL;DRB
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    1310 months ago

    This is the best summary I could come up with:


    The clock is ticking for Donald Trump to pony up roughly half a billion dollars to satisfy two recent courtroom losses.

    The cash crunch challenges Trump’s long-projected image of a successful businessman with deep pockets and a maverick’s ability to outmaneuver legal and financial troubles.

    Now, the presumptive Republican presidential nominee for 2024 could end up heavily indebted to a bank, donor, or some other source of capital.

    Trump has until Monday to post $83.3 million to meet the judgment for defaming writer E. Jean Carroll and denying her rape allegations against him.

    Without any changes, Trump said he would need to produce $91.63 million, which includes the district court’s common practice of requiring a bond of 110% of the judgment.

    March 25, meanwhile, is also the first day of jury selection in Trump’s first criminal trial, related to the cover up of hush money payments to Stormy Daniels.


    The original article contains 410 words, the summary contains 143 words. Saved 65%. I’m a bot and I’m open source!

  • ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
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    810 months ago

    assuming half of the population is braindead means 165,5 million ppl need to give less than 50bucks. bam. consider it done. trump will get the money.

    • @NineMileTower
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      810 months ago

      Assuming that Trump’s voter base keeps more than $50 cash in their trailer is a rather bold assumption to make.

  • bean
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    810 months ago

    Or he faces jail time… right? Right guys? Heh… 😔

    • @RapidcreekOP
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      1910 months ago

      No. They start taking his assets

    • @[email protected]
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      10 months ago

      This is a civil case, jail ixnf an option. But they can take his buildings by force

      Edit: *isn’t

        • @SeabassDan
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          110 months ago

          Which wouldn’t work because they want us to keep digging ourselves into a deeper hole and line their pockets with interest without ever actually bringing the balances down. Can’t really do that in prison where you’re not generating any income for yourself.

          • @Stovetop
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            10 months ago

            Can’t really do that in prison where you’re not generating any income for yourself.

            You say that but prisons can and do force prisoners to work jobs and then use the income from that job to pay for the prisoner’s own sentence.

            Most people who leave prison leave with a hefty bill for room and board, even after performing legal slave labor.

            • @SeabassDan
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              410 months ago

              I didn’t know that part, I figured with privatization it was the prisons making money just from having more people locked up, and any work they got was essentially slave labor for the benefit of the prison and its partners for pennies on the dollar.

              • @Stovetop
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                310 months ago

                Relatively speaking, very few prisons in the US are private/for profit, but the majority of US prisons make use of prison slave labor and bill prisoners for their sentence.

      • @Num10ck
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        610 months ago

        I’m curious what happens if they take his buildings that are used as collateral for other buildings/loans. might cost him much more?