• ObliviousEnlightenment
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    7 months ago

    Alright I’ve been thinking. When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade- make life take the lemons back. Get mad. I don’t want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons, do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s going to burn your house down…with the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

  • @jordanlund
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    347 months ago

    Somebody needs to make life take those lemons back!

        • @[email protected]
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          247 months ago

          When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

          Cave Johnson

          • @samus12345
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            67 months ago

            Burning people! He says what we’re all thinking!

      • @RGB3x3
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        77 months ago

        But who wants to be a lemon-stealing whore?

        • @AngryCommieKender
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          7 months ago

          I’m not stealing them, if I don’t pick them, they fall off and rot doing no good for the tree, thereby completely wasting all the energy the tree spent on making the things. There aren’t a lot of marsupials or rodents that have the right type of hands/paws for meaningfully harvesting and spreading of the seeds in my neck of the desert to take care of seed distribution for the tree naturally.

          Yes, I am growing lemons, avocados, limes, peaches, bananas, and figs currently in a desert with only collected rainwater, and grey water from my washing machine. There’s no city water involved. It doesn’t rain very often outside of the “cool autumn” season for about four months of the year, the other 8 months are “warm spring” we don’t really get rain then, which is why I have 3400 gallons of rainwater storage that gets refilled in the first or second rain of the season.

    • @aulin
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      7 months ago

      It’s good that this came along, since the Cave Johnson monologue just reads like a Karen nowadays.

      • @AnUnusualRelic
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        67 months ago

        When life gives you Karens, you just make karenade!

    • @ripcord
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      37 months ago

      This is terrible business advice.

  • @Anamnesis
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    167 months ago

    Me after working every day for four months straight. 😑

      • @Anamnesis
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        37 months ago

        Yeah I work four part time jobs. I’m working every single day. It is a real bummer.

          • @Anamnesis
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            47 months ago

            Just a few more months and I’ll only have one and all my debt will be paid off. There’s light at the end of the tunnel!

        • Firestorm Druid
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          27 months ago

          Well, not so much a job as an apprenticeship that I’m payed for. But yea, I’ve only had to work Saturdays when I worked in retail.

  • @undergroundoverground
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    107 months ago

    “Unless life is also giving you sugar, your lemonade is going to taste like shit.”

  • @[email protected]
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    97 months ago

    … is he making lemon-shaped piss bombs from those piss jars which are then vacuumed away for safe storage & times of need?

    There might have been a mixup & life keeps accidentally giving me those lemons.

  • @HootinNHollerin
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    7 months ago

    Battles have literally been won on avoiding scurvy. Can’t remember which side but Spainish armada vs England naval battles. Had spies report back they were eating sauerkraut and thus didn’t get scurvy. Hard to fight a war while sick

  • @eldavi
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    57 months ago

    deleted by creator

  • @Katana314
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    47 months ago

    Is that how it’s told now?
    Is it all so old?
    Is it made of lemon juice?
    doorknob ankle cold