Americans are fond of what people tell them is in the Bible, which is usually what they agree with anyway because it’s told to them by a pastor who shares their politics.

A bunch of years ago, I tried to read the Bible. I got about a third of the way through the Old Testament. It’s just so bad. And I’m not even talking about the messages found therein, it’s just bad writing.

Im not religious but when the pandemic hit and I found myself bereft of what I needed. I was so glad to have a bible I could rely on. /s (see if you can figure it out)

It’s literally unreadable. Soo many outdated metaphors and weak self references and random conjectures that look important, but actually aren’t. Besides the fact that different denominations cherry pick to establish their views, occasionally there are parts where they straight up can’t agree what it’s supposed to mean. The bible it self is proof that any supposed god is a major fucking asshole.

The problem is the bible doesn’t mean much anyway. Christian ministries are glad to cherry pick passages that can be interpreted to inform their own values, and also to select versions of the bible that are prone to this (which is one of the reasons the KJV is so popular). In 2019, of only 30% of the eighty million evangelists were literate in what their ministry asserted, that is, studied the bible or was aware of the statement of faith of their ministry, so there are a lot of Christians who do not fully reflect on what it is to be Christian.

Curiously this runs contrary common Protestant doctrine Sola Scriptura ( by scripture alone, ) which asserts that it is up to the parishioner to read the bible and understand for themselves what it means to them. And Christians individually just have to choose what doctrine is important, and which isn’t just as they have to negotiate with the parts about slavery. And the doctrine Sola Fide (by faith alone) means that their faith is enough for salvation, and no ministry has to stamp their wrist.

Note that these protestant dictums were critical at the time of their declaration because the Church routinely manipulated scripture, and gatekept salvation to serve political ends, and to manipulate parishioners to fulfill those ends, from doing sexual favors for the clergy to sending crusaders off to war. It was restoring the spiritual welfare of the people back to the people.

Today, the scholarly consensus, what is taught in seminary, is that the bible is not univocal (it’s different people opining, often in correspondence), not inerrant (plenty of contradictions with history, with scientific observation and with other passages), and not divinely inspired (just a bunch of stone-age guys taking guesses and sharing mythology). When the bible is asserted to be any of these things, it is according to the doctrine of a ministry, possibly a post-biblical tradition.

But again sola scriptura can and should negate such assertions: The bible is only what you need it to be, even if that’s just an ace doorstop.

Addendum: Once sin is meaningless, once can choose who you want to be, it becomes your responsibility to decide your own morality, your own principles and your own loyalties. Most of us figure out pretty quickly that parasites, predators and elements are out and eager to kill us, and that cooperation is a force multiplier. Morality is simply the negotiation of those terms.

There are modernized versions if they really wanted to read it. 🤷