Finally, an entire generation’s skillset will be put to good use.

Was it a logitech? lol

Scientists have hailed the decision to remotely augment the swine with breast implants as being “as historic of a leap forward in technology as it is a remarkably questionable abuse of modern medicine.”

To the researchers’ credit, the pig later received a promotion and unexpected bonus even though the sleazy district manager recently insisted that there “weren’t enough funds for raises this year.”

^\s in case it needs to be said^