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The only crimes here are that the cheese isn’t melted sufficiently, the pepperoni is undercooked, and that the pineapple is likely a best lukewarm.
This was already a bad idea, but they left the bark and hair on?
Well, how else would we know it’s a pineapple and thus get triggered?
When you bite into the core, you’ll know.
Maybe they’ve invented the pizza handle?
How to give an Italian a stroke
