I always thought this was a fun topic. What power would you choose?

    • @[email protected]
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      1 year ago

      Side effect: your voice cracks in an absurd way every time you use this power. Both parties find it too funny to continue fighting. They instead laugh at you.

  • @NucleusAdumbens
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    311 year ago

    The power to stop/start time at will while still able to move & interact with stuff

      • @Dagnet
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        221 year ago

        Your side effect is super cool, specially if you imagine that even light would be frozen in time. People in this thread keep choosing side effects that would ruin the super power but this one would be a problem but still worth using the power. With some practice you might even overcome some of thrle drawbacks.

        Now I want a super hero with this power and side effect

        • @[email protected]
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          111 year ago

          I like it especially if it works like a switch. Imagine how perfect your naps would be. You’d never oversleep.

          • @[email protected]
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            81 year ago

            Do you age while time is stopped? If so, might want to rethink those perfect naps. I’d 100% abuse it though.

      • @NucleusAdumbens
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        61 year ago

        Oh man that’s a good one. So much for driving all those vacant Ferraris

        • @Bdtrngl
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          61 year ago

          Would an engine still work if time was frozen though? And if so technically you could still drive with your eyes closed.

    • Piecemakers
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      211 year ago

      What’s funny is that the most obvious side effect to this is the most realistic: molecular manipulation in this way causes an incredible build-up of energy that either expresses as kinetic or thermal, depending, and almost always exponentially explosive from the moment you turn time back “on”… to say nothing of the disastrous effects at the fringes for such time-stop powers…

      tl;dr: The Flash would’ve incinerated the entire planet long before he discovered how to keep from glassing it simply by practicing his powers.

      • Bizarroland
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        101 year ago

        This is far more insidious than it seems.

        That would basically mean whenever you stop time you are locked in position.

      • @[email protected]
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        51 year ago

        Also photons cease to exist once you move into their space, there would be no light to enter your eyes attoseconds after stopping time, meaning you would be blind.

  • U de Recife
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    291 year ago

    Wherever I am, everything becomes peaceful. Nations at war start peace talks. Long standing conflicts are immediately solved.

    • @ManjuuLemmy
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      1 year ago

      They (the place ) can no longer stand you and you can never stay in a single place for more than a day.

      • U de Recife
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        1 year ago

        Hahaha. You got me!

        I’ll be like Lassie (the classical trope of the main character charging setting every episode).

    • @[email protected]
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      81 year ago

      All of the violence and hatred that would have been present around you gets redirected somewhere else in the world. The more discord there was in a place before you arrived, the harder the redirection hits its new location. You occupy a bubble of peace but outside of it things get even worse. You always hear about this and see the consequences of it but you are never able to directly observe it because whenever you try, the discord gets redirected somewhere else.

      • U de Recife
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        31 year ago

        You cursed me!

        I especially (dis)like the fact that I may occupy a bubble of peace, but at the same time knowing things are getting worse.

        You reduced me to either an obnoxious self-entitled prick, or a pathetic loser.

        Thanks a lot. The world now hates me…

    • Bizarroland
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      451 year ago

      Now you can also speak and translate the languages of the trees and the rocks and the inanimate objects all around you and you have no way to get them to shut up.

      • subignition
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        131 year ago

        First human being to get ghosted by the earth; I can live with that honor

  • @ape_arms
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    251 year ago

    The power of anti-cheeto dust fingers.

    • @Brokewood
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      341 year ago

      Swallowing pills is extremely difficult, and can only be roughed down with a semi chicken dance shuffle that involves hopping and takes 4 minutes too long for anyone noticing.

    • @[email protected]
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      111 year ago

      Viagra no longer works. You can no longer get high off any opiod, just the painkilling effects. Cortisone no longer treats skin conditions. Breast cancer meds, HIV retrovirals, rogaine, most antidepressants, and you’d better stay tf away from blood thinners and valium

  • @Dradious
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    1 year ago

    Immunity to internet-reply-based side effects

    • @Bluerat
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      341 year ago

      But Everyone loves you. Oh… wait…

    • @boeman
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      261 year ago

      It’s all rotten.

      • Bizarroland
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        171 year ago

        Which sounds really bad but then you can basically replace all of the fertilizer in the world and will solve the nitrogen runoff problem for all of the planet for your entire life.

    • @FooBarrington
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      121 year ago

      It manifests as a storm cloud, raining the food down over a large area over a short period of time.

    • xigoi
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      31 year ago

      Having this ability will cause you to lose self-control and become morbidly obese.

  • @Tikiporch
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    181 year ago

    How bout the power… to move you.

  • Qyuzu
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    161 year ago

    The ability to resolve any kind of conflict!

    • @Bluerat
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      411 year ago

      You can only do it with extreme violence

  • @orangeNgreenOPM
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    161 year ago

    I’ll go first. The power to always know a person’s next move.

    • @NucleusAdumbens
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      1 year ago

      Side effect: you have a vision of the first move they’d make after taking your mom/dad on a date

    • @xylogx
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      101 year ago

      First commentor missed the Cassandra side effect: you can do nothing to change it and no one believes you.

    • sharpiemarker
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      61 year ago

      You can see a person’s next move at the expense of generating negative causality, wherein large objects are attracted to you at high speed. See the man unwrapping a sandwich? Boom, hit by a bus/piano/anvil/whale.

  • @Dellyjonut
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    141 year ago

    You have the power to make people instantly be extremely hungry

    • @NucleusAdumbens
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      221 year ago

      Side effect: you have a premonition of exactly what their bowel movement will smell like as a result of whatever they eat due to their hunger