don’t know the artist, just like the comic. check ‘slow query log’, you heathens.
This gives me flashbacks to when I took over a small call center as there DBA.
Part of their data was in access, part of it was in notepad, and the rest was in a shoddy looking sql database.
It took me two years to get everything into a data warehouse.
But some of those queries. Oof
hope the code could be modded. search options often looked harmless until combined in a shortcut oneliner function. lol
I don’t use slow query log, I once heard many years ago this causes my services to slow down after being turned on.
Not only that, it sounds woke. I use astrology to help me find the big meanies. While some find this ridiculous, there is a lot of sales energy targeting this to executives!!
probably turned off after use. only way to track down intermittent lag issues. i’m a virgo so immune to marketing
was joke, ‘kfc has quesadillas?’
👀
People like to shit on MySQL, I get it, but this is just stupid. No relational database on this planet could handle such an unoptimized situation in adequate time.
This is standard in enterprise software and mssql’s bread and butter
If you ignore the “no indexes” part (can’t request that in normal SQL anyway) then PostgreSQL absolutely can handle queries like that.
With indexes, so can MySQL or MariaDB. That’s why I said “unoptimized”. Postgres is certainly superior when it comes to more complex or analytical queries, but that’s because MySQL/MariaDB simply weren’t MADE for these kind of situations. And even postgres will struggle with an unoptimized, data-intensive workload. I’ve seen those in the wild.
It’s like shipping a formula 1 car into the desert and wondering why you’re last in the desert rally.
