Norovirus vomit.

Anal gland squeezings from my cat. I didn’t want to spend another $300 at the vet and did it myself. The horrors.

Not “sprayed” per se but it seems squirrel monkeys pee on their hands and touch stuff to mark it. One of these guys was sitting at the back of my neck when they decided it’s time to clarify who owns what. So he started to pee on his hands while still sitting there and most of it ran down my spine. The he proceeded to touch my hair and clothes.

The smell was tolerable but being covered in monkey pee still was something I hadn’t on my radar…

Human piss grossest.

Worst thing was gasoline covered head to toe when a hose sprung a leak when I was working as a full service gas station attendant. I’m glad it wasnt propane though

I’ve been skunked before.

Which smelled bad (understatement), but didnt feel gross. Meanwhile, the solution being to wash yourself with tomato sauce felt hella icky.

I used to work at a fish packing factory and had to get something out of a skip bin and i fell getting in. I was drenched in rotting fish guts and green slime that had been sitting for a couple of days out in the heat of the Aussie QLD summer (around 40C)

Squeezed pus out of a cyst for my brother. It shot out and got me in the eye. Thank dog I wear glasses.

Not directly sprayed, but someone shot of pepper spray in the restaurant I worked at years ago as a prank. Couldn’t breath right the rest of the night.

Doing electrical work in a chicken rendering plant. I was sprayed with the liquefied remains of chickens that were at least a week old coming out of a tanker truck into a pit that was outside with a sea of flys covering it like a tarp. To make it worse, I looked over at a guy 10ft away eating a bowl of fruit loops like it was a normal day, that experience changed my life because I never want that to me my normal.

Damn, reading these makes my horse piss look positively tame.

Elon Musk

Worked at a restaurant hood cleaning company once. Sometimes the techs had to bring back buckets of grease they removed from a place because there’s a lot of rules around where you can dispose of it.

Walked into the shop at the wrong time and got hit in the chest with a spray of rancid, black grease. Had to throw those clothes away because I couldn’t get it out.

Work’s pink multi surface cleaner. Never knew I’d know exactly what the fuck poison tastes like! Gotta say, pretty unpleasant

Healthcare…you get numb to a lot. But honestly I can’t stand phlegm.

My baby sons ass while changing a diaper…

I have 2 kids so, vomit, poop, blood, mucus, and even breast milk.