I love my smart TV. I love the way it takes a long time to boot up because it’s trying to refresh the advertisements on the home screen. I delight in the way it randomly restarts because it’s downloaded an update without asking me, each of which makes the TV slower and slower with every subsequent install. I adore the way it buries the apps that I want to use, and that I use without fail every single time, below the apps that it’s being paid to promote and which I have never touched in my life and would never use without the cold metal of a glock pressed hard against my sweating temple. I am infinitely thrilled by the way the interface lags constantly, due to the need to have one thousand unnecessary animations rendered on hardware ripped wholesale from a ten year old phone. I feel myself borne aloft on wings of pure joy when I am notified that my data will be collected and analysed to determine my usage patterns. Even now I am writing this from a field of beautiful flowers and soft luscious grass as I lie and look up happily at the bright blue sky, smiling happily to know that this is the future of technology

  • @Drewdp
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    311 year ago

    I got my first smart TV a few years ago. After about a week I took away its ability to connect to my wifi and plugged the chromecast Dongle back in.

    It’s not allowed to be smart anymore.

    • @TheDoozer
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      131 year ago

      I didn’t realize you could lobotomize a TV for being an asshole. What a time to be alive.

  • @rockSlayer
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    161 year ago

    God I love this copypasta. Every sentence was better than the last

  • wuphysics87
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    91 year ago

    Worst part is how long it takes to switch sources. I don’t need you to scan. Switch to the god damn thing!

  • @halcyoncmdr
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    91 year ago

    This sounds like LG and Samsung smart TVs.

    I have a TCL running Roku TV and don’t have those issues. There’s the Roku ads sure, but it isn’t randomly changing my channel/app lineup or restarting to install updates unexpectedly. It just sort of works. It’s why I went with something running Roku software instead of the manufacturer bullshit.

    It’s just like car infotainment systems. They almost all suck still, and CarPlay and Android Auto are infinitely better options.

    • @Bayz0r
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      11 year ago

      I have LG smart TVs and have literally none of these problems. Sounds like user error to me.

  • @Cruxifux
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    91 year ago

    The enshittification of things that used to be good online and with technology in general every time profit motives and quarterly profit increases get brought into the picture I become enraged once anew by how much I hate this capitalist, ayn rand wet dream, horrible ass society we’ve allowed to be created around us through the inaction of us and our parents and grandparents.

  • Mossy Feathers (They/Them)
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    61 year ago

    I recently came across a CRT monitor similar to the one I had growing up, which led me to reviving my grandfather’s old Windows XP machine that has an AMD Semperon 2200+ processor with 2gb of ram, a 128mb video card, and a 100gb, 5200rpm IDE HDD (not even SATA!). It’s slow, but consistently slow. Despite this, it is way more responsive than my windows 10 machine. This is a PC with a Ryzen 9 3600x, 32gb ram, RTX 3060 TI, and a 1tb Samsung SSD (can’t remember what exact model, it’s one of the high-end ones) for the OS and some games (I also have several terabytes in 5200 and 7200rpm drives, mainly for general storage and smaller/older games that don’t benefit as much from an SSD).

    When I tell that slow-ass XP machine to jump, it immediately jumps. It doesn’t jump very high and it stutters a bit while it’s in the air, but it doesn’t sit there for a moment figuring out how how to jump, how high it should jump and if it should jump. It just jumps. This is a PC that was low-end when it was new, compared to a modern PC that’s somewhere between a mid-range/high-end PC.

    It took four tries to get it to boot when I started it for the first time in like, 10 years, and the OS desperately needs to be reloaded as it keeps forgetting drivers, but holy shit despite being slow and in bad shape, it is infinitly more responsive than my “gaming rig”. I had forgotten how much fun it can be to just use a PC. The dopamine rush I got from a combination of nostalgia and using a PC that did what I wanted it to, when I wanted it to, was euphoric.

    I’m sooo happy that PCs are regressing.

    ^inb4 ^just ^use ^linux

    • @Radio_717
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      1 year ago

      I have no idea what you’re trying to say here. Did you forget a /s?

      If you’re talking about bloatware just build your own PC next time.

      • Mossy Feathers (They/Them)
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        The last bit about being happy that PCs were regressing was sarcastic, the rest wasn’t. I did build my own PC. With the exception of a laptop I got while I was in college, I’ve always built my own PCs and have done so since I was 9 or 10. I was legitimately shocked at how much more responsive that shitty XP machine was when I first got it running again, despite being slow as fuck. PCs have gotten faster, but the programs, driver packages and “”“necessary”“” bloatware that tries to run in the background is insane.

        Software has gotten so ridiculously bloated and slow, but you don’t notice it until you go back to an older OS. Then you realize that there’s a lot of software for Win98, XP, etc that does the same exact thing, or more, as its Windows 10 equivalents, but it does it with a fraction of the ram, hard drive space, and processing power. For an example, I currently have a mouse with remappable buttons, and 10-15yrs ago I had a Logitech keyboard with a ton of macro keys and a cool little LCD display that could interact with some games to tell you things like health, ammo, who was in control of what parts of the map, etc, depending on the game. Why is it that the software required to remap the buttons on the mouse runs like ass while the Logitech software for the macro keys never gave me any issues 10-15 years ago? They do almost the exact same thing. WHY IS IT SO FUCKING SLOW!?

        The reason why I haven’t switched to Linux is because there are programs that I use which likely wouldn’t perform well running via Wine or Proton, and I really don’t want to dual-boot and deal with the headache of having to reboot every time I want to use it. However, I’m starting to get to the point where I’m seriously considering it, despite the headache and annoyance.

  • rustydomino
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    51 year ago

    Run pi-hole on your home LAN and it makes 99.9% of this problem go away.

  • @[email protected]
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    21 year ago

    Same thing happens on Vizio Smart TV. Is there a way to jail break a TV? I’m so sick of all the added shit

  • @[email protected]
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    11 year ago

    This is such a load of bollocks.

    I’m on my second smart TV, first one being an LG I had four five years and now a Samsung for the last two. Aside from one small and easily ignorable advert on the Samsung home menu there really aren’t that many, and they’ve never slowed down the TVs boot. The app menus were fully customisable allowing you to put your most used apps at the start. The LG was as fast as it came out the box when I replaced it and the Samsung is doing fine two years later. Never had an update happen while I’m watching or using the screen, you get a pop-up to let you know it’s ready and it installs next time you go into standby.

    This guy must be buying some dirt cheap TVs to get this experience.

    • @[email protected]
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      21 year ago

      Yeah op must be talking about some cheapest of the cheapest tv’s. I’m also on my second smart tv. I tend to buy tv’s at around 1000€ price range as that has so far been the best bang for buck personally. Never had any issues like that, tv turns on instantly and updates have always happened during nights when I’ve been asleep. My current Samsung sometimes displays a small add on the home screen, which isn’t really that bad I guess, but out of principle it’s still mildly infuriating imo. I paid for my tv so I expect zero ads.