(Title works better if you pronounce ‘Han’ the way Billy Dee Williams does.)

  • @Wogi
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    1031 year ago

    This is a great example of why you should introduce new characters when you want to fill in backstory. It’s one thing for your established characters to make an appearance, but Star Wars even over does THAT. What Jedi hasn’t lost a fight to Vader and survived in the decades between RoS and ANH?

    At this point it’s more like one established but admittedly evil government failing to stop 6 guys with a truck for 40 years.

    • Flying SquidOP
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      441 year ago

      It’s very Dickensian. Everyone is connected to everyone else in some way or other. In a vast galaxy.

      • @AngryCommieKender
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        1 year ago

        Well, it’s not unreasonable to assume that pretty much all Jedi/Sith knew all the other Jedi or Sith. The absolute height of force users in the galaxy is only around 22,000 split 10,000/10,000/2,000 Jedi/Sith/Revanite. That two fucking families ended up spawning the majority of force users for a period of about 100 years seems unreasonable to me, but I’m not Lucas’s ex-wife, and she seems to be the main force for storyboarding episodes 4 and 5.

        Honestly I think Anakin finding out about Darth Nox/Oculus would have been a much more interesting way for him to fall. Darth Plagius is too straightforward to make his fall interesting and complex.

    • @[email protected]
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      261 year ago

      The number of jedi that didn’t die in order 66 is increasing at a pretty surprising rate. A few more shows and the jedi order could have been restored without help from Luke.

  • Ð Greıt Þu̇mpkin
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    641 year ago

    “SERIOUSLY, WHERE DO I KNOW YOU FROM‽”

    “YOU DON’T!”

    “HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE, YOU HAVE LITERALLY ALL OF MY FORMER ACQUAINTANCES WITH YOU SAVE MY PADAWAN!”

    • @AngryCommieKender
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      101 year ago

      Han needed to have Starkiller hidden in a smuggling compartment, and Juno on standby for emergency extraction.

  • @[email protected]
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    521 year ago

    “Um, Actually” Han didn’t turn up with Vader’s daughter, he came to rescue her from her father who had just obliterated her foster parents.

    • Lux
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      371 year ago

      “Um, Actually” Han didn’t know she was there until they already got there

      • @[email protected]
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        1 year ago

        You totally win that point! And to anyone who hasn’t watched Dropout TV’s “Um, Actually” and enjoyed this thread, you’re going to love that show.

  • [email protected]
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    411 year ago

    Just a reminder that George Lucas’s headcanon for the initial 6 movies involves R2-D2 embellishing its role in these stories in the distant future.

    • @AngryCommieKender
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      1 year ago

      He stuck around till he got his full reward paid to him which doesn’t happen until RotJ, he only got a partial payment at the beginning of TESB, and as soon as he finally gets released from Carbonite, and got paid he split. That wasn’t altruism, that was business.

      Speaking of which, if The Rebels had paid him after ANH, instead of just giving him and Chewie an apparently “worthless” medal and medal-sash(?) , he probably could have paid off Jabba, and avoided the carbonite entirely.

      I’m not discounting the fact that he came back with no reward offered. That is what makes Han a hero. Until that point he’s just doing what he has to do to get a profit, because his ship needed repairs and those aren’t going to pay for themselves. There’s no dishoner in that, he’s just trying to survive, and he doesn’t think that The Rebels have any sort of chance against The Empire, since he has literally seen just how brutal The Empire is firsthand. This is a guy that ran away from The Empire so he could be his own man. He’s not going to hitch his plow to some other group just because they have his ideals. He’s more pragmatic than that, and they had to prove to him that they could, and more importantly would, stand up to this insurmountable foe that he’s been fighting against, and mostly failing, for most of his adult life.

      Han became a hero. There’s no doubt about that. I’m not so sure Luke ever really did. Luke did heroic things, that’s true. Luke complained about being forced into the hero role so much that I’m not going to call him a real hero. He’s an unwilling hero. He never wanted this, and complains loudly every step of the way.

      Han on the other hand never thought of himself as a hero, even after he became one. He’s a hero not by choice, but by circumstance because he was on a path he never really has any control over. This is a guy who just wanted to make enough credits to retire to a nice peaceful planet, and the universe itself forces him into a position that, while he never wanted that, he accepts without much complaint and ends up thriving as a “General.” I’m pretty certain that he literally laughs inside any time anyone calls him a General.

      • @[email protected]
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        1 year ago

        You literally see him loading crates of cash onto his ship before the assault on the Death Star in A New Hope where he and Luke have this exchange:

        Luke: So… you got your reward and you’re just leaving then?

        Han Solo: That’s right, yeah. I got some old debts I’ve got to pay off with this stuff. Even if I didn’t, you don’t think I’d be fool enough to stick around here, do you? Why don’t you come with us? You’re pretty good in a fight. We could use you.

        Then he comes back after helping in the fight and Leia says, “I knew there was more to you than money.”

  • freamon
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    111 year ago

    Huh. Didn’t know that about R2 - that little droid has been literally everywhere.

    • @Omnificer
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      1 year ago

      One time Anakin lost R2 in a space battle and insisted on a rescue mission. He was told no, because it’s a droid, and then Anakin had to explain that he never wipes R2’s memory banks and R2 has accumulated massive amounts of sensitive intel for the Republic military.

      What Anakin doesn’t mention is the alarming amount of info R2 has on the Jedi, Anakin and Padme’s personal life, Naboo, the Senate, and whatever Separatist data is in whatever systems R2 is hacking into that week.

      At that point, Leia giving R2 the Death Star plans is basically par for the course.

      • DearOldGrandma
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        251 year ago

        R2 is the Star Wars equivalent to the Library of Alexandria

        • credit crazy
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          31 year ago

          Considering how little r2s memory is wiped it’s a miracle his hard drive has never filled up

    • Flying SquidOP
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      131 year ago

      R2 technically wasn’t his astromech, but he and Obi-Wan certainly utilized R2’s abilities multiple times.

      • freamon
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        161 year ago

        Oh ok. I think Wookieepedia disagrees, maybe:

        Amidala gave R2-D2 to [Anakin] Skywalker when he became a Jedi Knight, and the astromech droid faithfully served him throughout the war, often flying in the droid socket of Skywalker’s starfighter or fighting next to him on the front lines.

        • Flying SquidOP
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          61 year ago

          Ok, fair enough, I thought he was just on loan.

          • Deceptichum
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            101 year ago

            How about we let him be his own bot and not endorse the cruel and sadistic slavery and hatred shown towards droids by Jedi and all others alike.

            • Flying SquidOP
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              1 year ago

              Sorry, despite clearly having full conscious sentience, droids are property in the Star Wars galaxy. And we’re all supposed to accept that. Now someone get the restraining bolt.

              • @Touching_Grass
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                61 year ago

                Well without robot serving their makers they would not have any reason to exist or be created so therefore robots value a life of servitude to their creators because otherwise their existence is meaninglessness and I think I just reinvented religion

                • @Death_Equity
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                  21 year ago

                  You either reinvented religion or slavery of “lesser people”.

            • @[email protected]
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              71 year ago

              In my headcanon the droids are actually cybernetic shells for the brains of captured living creatures. They have had their memories wipe, but aspects of their personalities show up.

              R2 has no mouth, but he must scream.

            • @Whimsical
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              51 year ago

              Let’s be real, if we wanna talk about possessiveness, Anakin was R2’s bodyguard more than R2 was Anakin’s droid

              Little astromech is in absolute control

    • @EdibleFriend
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      71 year ago

      It’s official canon it was in your moms room last night.

      • credit crazy
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        21 year ago

        Considering my mum is into bdsm I can see how r2 is scared of her

  • Square Singer
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    31 year ago

    Tbh, I never really got the idea of the millenium falcon.

    It’s essentially one of these lorries some redneck modified into a jet truck dragster. These things are fast, but not agile and maneuverable at all, and they still don’t compete at all against vehicles that are purpouse-bult for speed/agility by real engineers in big corporations with large budgets.

    Can’t tell me, that planet-sized ship building corporations which exist in Star Wars with their near-infinite budget can’t put together anything that’s faster.

    • @Death_Equity
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      21 year ago

      It has powerful main engines, powerful maneuvering thrusters, and sturdy contruction. Without cargo it can move fast, be agile, and handle lots of force from rapid changes in direction.

      It is the right vehicle to be used in the wrong way and perform splendidly with the right pilot.

      Nobody makes anything faster because there is no sense in doing so just to catch that one guy. They build ships for a purpose and chasing down one scruffy looking nerf-herder isn’t profitable.

      • Square Singer
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        21 year ago

        So there is no speedracing scene?

        No big empires that want propaganda weapons?

        No companies who want the marketing ploy of “We make the fastest ship”?

        There’s no practical reason why any car company would build a car that can go beyond 150km/h either, yet every car manufacturer has their sports/hyper car brand to show off.

        There’s no practical reason for nascar, Formula 1 or the land speed record either.

        Yet all of that exists and all of that gets really nice funding.

        They’ve got an empire that builds moon-sized space stations for propaganda reasons, but doesn’t build the fastest and most maneuverable dogfighter?

        It makes no sense to build a death star either. It unless you factor propaganda in.

        Kinda like Dubai has hyper cars for their police. There’s no practical reason for that either.

        • @[email protected]
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          11 year ago

          Firepower, speed, cost. Normally, pick 2 (if you’re a military group, hobbies, racer, whatever) but a smuggler has a good reason to pick 3