I’ll start. Non serious answers also welcome

  1. Linux (Linux)

  2. FOSS or die

  3. Video content should have been text

  4. Not caring a LOT about privacy makes you a non-lemmy normie

(…)

  • Lvxferre@lemmy.ml
    110·
    1 year ago

    5. We don’t talk about Reddit here. Except when we do.
    6. [De]federation is srs bizniz.
    7. Seize the means of production computation.
    8. People from that instance over there are bad.

      • cheese_greater
        93·
        1 year ago

        I only hate Lemmy.ml or whatever its instance is cuz they banned me “for no reason”.

        I think it was related to vaccuums, they wanted to clean up the place and thats hard to do when guys are jizzing in vaccuum s i guess…?

        Edit: also, for all i know vacuums are manufactured in Malaysia (ML?) and the communist government “forced” their bloody hands on it. Still doesn’t make for a free and purely rational discussion forum.

          • cheese_greater
            4·
            1 year ago

            Reminds me of Tildes honestly. Had some great discussions but the condescending loser assholes and the ruthless moderation by @deimos was insanely non-evenhanded ultimately and lost them a contributor who actually brought thoughtful if idiosyncratic views on things that always created abundant engagement. Ah, its just as well. I need fewer distractions and at least with Lemmy, theres lots of space (instance-permitting) to be me. Same reason why I like Lobste.rs: smart folks but way to harsh+judgemental and inflexible, like a computer program lol

              • cheese_greater
                3·
                1 year ago

                I think my mortal sin was making a joke about wine producers creating like a jelly or candy from leftover shit

                I said:

                WineGums

                User banned

                Also jail

  • Leraje@lemmy.blahaj.zoneEnglish
    902·
    1 year ago
    1. If you get kicked from an instance, upon joining a new instance, make your first post a furious comment on the admins/mods/hivemind of the instance that kicked you, completely forgetting we can all see the modlog.
    • cheese_greater
      16·
      1 year ago

      Can you show it to me for me+Lemmy.ML im legit curious about why they put a pin in me. I have zero pride about me/it despite my recent post concerning same. I’m judt pissed i nvr found out what did it but I’m curious/desirous of finding out and Lemmy can hold my feet to the fire Re:holding myself accountable if its a real reason and not some of the ideological bullcrap they’ve been accused of

  • thanks_shakey_snake@lemmy.ca
    801·
    1 year ago

    Your YouTube link should have been a Piped link but it’s okay.

    You’re free to enjoy the lemmit.online content, but don’t interact with it or you will appear confused.

    Don’t stress about upvotes/downvotes-- They’re even more made up here than usual.

    Never pass up an opportunity to bitch about ads, Chrome, Reddit, capitalism, Arch users, streaming services, or your favorite Lemmy client.

    Do not attempt the Picard Maneuver unless you’re sure you know what you’re doing.

    • Tattorack
      2·
      1 year ago

      Which Picard maneuver, though?

      The short jump one or the straightening uniform one?

  • kewwwi
    712·
    1 year ago

    can we be the internet community that doesn’t pretend we’re a tight knit group with injokes and ‘right’ opinions?

    there’s already enough of those and I hate navigating their dumb shit.

    • XbSuperEnglish
      141·
      1 year ago

      It’s a bit late for that. It’s already everywhere, and it’s terrible.

      • cheese_greater
        2·
        1 year ago

        Tildes is super strict against that, I got banned for making a joke about wine jelly being rendered into candy

        WineGums

        Banned!

        Also, JAIL! Belive it or not…

    • sock
      144·
      1 year ago

      yeah those unwritten rules are why i hardly want to tell anyone about this site. its a bunch of comp sci nerds that finally have a platform to talk to be mildly social

      and the humor is very par for course of compsci nerds. dumb, contrived, an obscure reference with a random jpeged gif in the background, etc. not funny.

      • cheese_greater
        3·
        1 year ago

        I have to fight you on the not funny take. I disagree and my oeuvre demonstrates that to the contrary in my respectful submission

        • sock
          12·
          1 year ago

          yo just your other 2 replies in this thread alone, im taking about you. youre the unfunny reddit compsci nerd.

          “[mutters]”

  • applejacks
    52·
    1 year ago

    everytime elon musk so much as farts, it must be posted to at least 10 different communities here and discussed at length

    • Ace T'Ken@lemmy.caEnglish
      61·
      1 year ago

      With 400 permutations of “Fuck this clown” and “how can I block mentions of him” in the comments.

      Unfortunately, shitty billionaires make the news. Get rid of billionaires and they won’t be in the news.

      • applejacks
        3·
        1 year ago

        oh cool, i’ll just eliminate billionaires then, that’s pretty easy for me to do.

        • Ace T'Ken@lemmy.caEnglish
          21·
          1 year ago

          Hey I’m just writing the rules down, not telling you you shouldn’t be annoyed by them.

  • muse@kbin.social
    546·
    1 year ago

    18: Don’t feed the tankies
    19: if you didn’t like Star Trek before, go to Risa and count the lights till you do

  • Sagrotan
    47·
    1 year ago

    Linux is bloat, I’m training the ants in a giant maze, got Doom running on it last weekend.

  • Mr_Blott
    39·
    1 year ago

    If a post from the Linux communities pops up on your feed, it is your duty as a Windows user to comment “wELL I dOn’t HavE tHAt prOBleM bECauSE I uSe wINdOws” to stop Linux users commenting the opposite on every fucking thread about Windows

    • kalkulat
      7·
      1 year ago

      But whatever they do they should not use the word it’s in their comment, or else we see something like itAಠ€'s … and thattAಠ€'s harder to read.

  • Margot Robbie
    37·
    1 year ago

    Future Oscar winning movie Barbie is the only permitted commercial interest on Lemmy.

    • NotSpez@lemm.eeOP
      161·
      1 year ago

      And the occasional Wolf of Wallstreet plug, if we mention Margot Robbie’s nude scene

      • Margot Robbie
        24·
        1 year ago

        Suspiciously named user, I literally plug all of my movies on this social media platform. Except the first Suicide Squad. And Terminal.

        Also, that’s esteemed Academy Award nominated character actress Margot Robbie to you!

        • shapis@lemmy.ml
          5·
          1 year ago

          Except the first Suicide Squad.

          The heck? That movie’s trailer slaps hard.

          • Margot Robbie
            8·
            1 year ago

            Unfortunately, somebody thought it was a good idea to edit the entire movie like the trailer…

            Also, Jared Leto(🤮).

            • wavebeam
              4·
              1 year ago

              that time he sent you a fucking pig carcass is so fucking deranged

        • NotSpez@lemm.eeOP
          2·
          1 year ago

          Good call on Terminal. Not the call to star in it, but to pretend it never happened. Also, no need to specify between Suicide Squad and The Suicide Squad, the second one had the The in the title suggesting that it is The one that counts.

          When ‘you’ win an oscar I will probably add it to the title, but thanks for the suggestion. ;)

  • Blackout@kbin.social
    363·
    1 year ago
    • no fucking swearing
    • no paying for content if it can be pirated
    • cats are our overlords
      • TheDoctorDonna
        41·
        1 year ago

        Even if you could download a car someone would find a way to nickle and dime you to death with maintenance and insurance. c/fuckcars! or gtfo

        Edit cause I don’t know how to link communities lol. That didn’t work as intended.

          • TheDoctorDonna
            31·
            1 year ago

            Technically yes. There’s lots of open source plans online to build your own bicycle.

            But even hypothetically a bike would be preferable to a car for everyone involved.

    • XbSuperEnglish
      11·
      1 year ago

      I hate cats so much. It makes the internet difficult.

    • cheese_greater
      2·
      1 year ago

      Sometimes, the pendulum needs to start a’swingin’ the othet direction