I wouldn’t dare defile Douglas Adam’s memory by not mentioning that you should keep a towel with you at all times, but my second contender is a surprisingly short three-parter:

  1. never lie.
  2. never tell the whole truth.
  3. never pass up a chance to use a real bathroom.
  • @Potatos_are_not_friends
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    322 days ago

    My wife, who gave two births, was in a car accident and fought through hell to survive, still rate kidney stones as the most painful thing in her life.

    I said would she rather take a bullet to the leg? She said she’d take two over a kidney stone.

    All of this can be resolved just by drinking water.