I can’t believe an adult just can’t wrap their head around this, bless your heart.
Maybe this will help: You tell your kid to put the dishes away, claiming so you can wash the dishes. But it’s not true in that you could wash the dishes without them having been put away. It just wouldn’t be as convenient. You could pile the dishes somewhere else, hell outside on the ground (lol) to make room in the sink and whatever while you clean other dishes. But it’d be inconvenient and stupid. You could wash the dishes on the kitchen table, but that’d also be inconvenient and stupid. You could do a lot of things but they wouldn’t be as convenient (and could be really stupid). So it’s not really that the dishes need to be put away so you can wash your dishes, it’s just it is much more convenient to do so. So what you are saying to the kid isn’t true in that sense.
So what you’re saying is, I should tell my daughter, “if you don’t put the dishes away, I will be forced to take them all outside and bring them in one by one and wash them.” Because that’s a sane thing to tell a child, rather than explain to them the concept of keeping things clean to keep the roaches away.
I didn’t say at all what you should say, I was just noting that what you’re saying isn’t exactly the truth. It wasn’t a value judgement or even advice.
“if you don’t put the dishes away, I will be forced to take them all outside and bring them in one by one and wash them.”
If you want help workshopping this you could say that it’s just more convenient to put them away. That’d be true without being very convoluted, if being 100% honest was the goal. Whether it should be or not, imo not.
Most children, I would wager, are not so stupid that when you say something like I said, they will think, “well he must mean that there is literally no other possible option and therefore he is being 100% honest with me.” I know my daughter isn’t. She understands nuance and she understands that means that in our house, we clean dishes with the dishwasher.
Again, what do you tell your kids? I’m starting to suspect you don’t have any, which is what prompted this conversation.
If they understand that then it seems like you could say that it’s just more convenient and it’d be the same, but also 100% truthful. Assuming that’s the goal.
Yes, again, my child is smart enough to understand nuance. She doesn’t have to have everything put to her 100% literally. I’m not sure why your children do.
Also, I hope you’re not the one who is responsible for telling your children the difference between things like “honest” and “100% literally true” or they are fucked.
Yes, again, my child is smart enough to understand nuance. She doesn’t have to have everything put to her 100% literally. I’m not sure why your children do.
Sounds like your daughter might have you beat there since I didn’t say she doesn’t, I didn’t say she does, I didn’t say they do.
Also, I hope you’re not the one who is responsible for telling your children the difference between things like “honest” and “100% literally true” or they are fucked.
I can’t believe an adult just can’t wrap their head around this, bless your heart.
Maybe this will help: You tell your kid to put the dishes away, claiming so you can wash the dishes. But it’s not true in that you could wash the dishes without them having been put away. It just wouldn’t be as convenient. You could pile the dishes somewhere else, hell outside on the ground (lol) to make room in the sink and whatever while you clean other dishes. But it’d be inconvenient and stupid. You could wash the dishes on the kitchen table, but that’d also be inconvenient and stupid. You could do a lot of things but they wouldn’t be as convenient (and could be really stupid). So it’s not really that the dishes need to be put away so you can wash your dishes, it’s just it is much more convenient to do so. So what you are saying to the kid isn’t true in that sense.
Does that finally explain it?
So what you’re saying is, I should tell my daughter, “if you don’t put the dishes away, I will be forced to take them all outside and bring them in one by one and wash them.” Because that’s a sane thing to tell a child, rather than explain to them the concept of keeping things clean to keep the roaches away.
Got it.
Is that what you tell your kids?
I didn’t say at all what you should say, I was just noting that what you’re saying isn’t exactly the truth. It wasn’t a value judgement or even advice.
If you want help workshopping this you could say that it’s just more convenient to put them away. That’d be true without being very convoluted, if being 100% honest was the goal. Whether it should be or not, imo not.
Most children, I would wager, are not so stupid that when you say something like I said, they will think, “well he must mean that there is literally no other possible option and therefore he is being 100% honest with me.” I know my daughter isn’t. She understands nuance and she understands that means that in our house, we clean dishes with the dishwasher.
Again, what do you tell your kids? I’m starting to suspect you don’t have any, which is what prompted this conversation.
If they understand that then it seems like you could say that it’s just more convenient and it’d be the same, but also 100% truthful. Assuming that’s the goal.
That it’s more convenient
Yes, again, my child is smart enough to understand nuance. She doesn’t have to have everything put to her 100% literally. I’m not sure why your children do.
Also, I hope you’re not the one who is responsible for telling your children the difference between things like “honest” and “100% literally true” or they are fucked.
Sounds like your daughter might have you beat there since I didn’t say she doesn’t, I didn’t say she does, I didn’t say they do.
That’s very sweet of you.
You said I wasn’t being honest with her by not telling her the 100% literal truth. So yeah, you’re saying she doesn’t understand nuance.
I said it’s a lighter lie in that it’s not actually (literally) true.