My dad was corrupted by social media. It’s getting a bit better, because he doesn’t have unlimited computer access anymore. But not long ago, his first sentence, after we hadn’t talked for a while, was: “What do you think about the woke agenda?”
He really suspended his real life and was almost 24/7 online and got deep in the wrong meta neighborhood.
My father was never like that before, i hope it’s not some state of perception that many of us are doomed to have sometime, because it’s age related.
I’m sorry to hear that. I “lost” my father in the same way. He was always conservative (listened to Rush when I was a kid), but he went from casually conservative to full MAGA radicalized thanks to facebook and modern social media. I went to his facebook a few years back and saw some of the most hateful vitriolic content. I asked him how he could do that to people who helped raise me, that I had both LGBTQ and mixed race teachers, leaders, friends, all of whom have been incredibly important to me. It did not go well. I had to tell him to allow his hate speech would be a disservice to everyone else who had such a profound impact on me, and told him if he loses the hate we can have a relationship again.
That was 6 years ago. Haven’t heard from him since.
I hope your dad is doing better than mine. I’ve seen others confirm what you said, that just cutting out the source will see a return to semi normalcy - the propaganda depends on a constant drip. Just disconnecting them from the feed can have a huge positive impact.
Very sorry to hear that, i hope there’s a near future in which you can come together with your father again.
What gets me every time, is the similarities in all stories i hear. It got really bad one time with my father, when we had a LGTBQ related discussion. I’m always shocked when i hear Anti-LGTBQ discussion points.
It’s like, they would rather kill 'em all, than to just live their own live and give a fuck who is fucking who.
As long as it’s all consensual adults …
Society should rather look at the sexual activities in their own circles. Most children are abused by relatives. While i have never heard of a transgender person abusing a child, i constantly hear about priests abusing children.
I live in another country than my parents and sometimes I’m grateful for that. I don’t know how i would have handled it, if we had constant contact and am somehow happy i didn’t have to. The distance is hard enough, everyone is getting older and i would love to be able to sit with my father in the garden and watch birds, like in the long ago times.
I opted to evade discussion and to try not to discuss anything politics with my father. I don’t want to spend the limited time we have together, fighting with him over such an absurd take on everything alive.
Think about it, the older they get, the less they’ll change. I figured that I’ll have to ignore that, talk about others things. It’s the only way, if i want to keep our relationship alive. There’s no more time to let grass grow over it or to let time heal things.
I appreciate it, and I hope your interactions with your father go better too. I know many many people who take your approach, just avoiding it. There’s no real right or wrong way, because we shouldn’t be in that position in the first place. I hope they stop bringing it up around you and respect your wishes about it.
Re: circles, maybe keeping it personal will help too. Turning off Fox news and sources will help, but my dad sure did shut up when I brought up the people he knew (and I know he liked) that he was talking about. They always go “They’re one of the good ones”, but then the reverse is “These policies effect the good ones too, dad”
i really appreciated our conversation. It made me rethink my behavior and realize that only avoiding talking about the elephant in the room may be the wrong thing.
Let’s see what the future brings.
I sure hope our dads may come around one day and also try to talk and discuss everything, without going directly into “I’m right, fight me” mode.
I know it’s weird here on the fediverse, but I’ve been through it. If you want, DM me anytime, or DM me and I can give my mastodon. Should probably start a community sometime. It’s been good talking to you too!
I wish you luck, but be prepared for anger in response. Just be ready for it. Make it not about the politics but instead the hate, the anger. Hell try to make it about politics but instead make it about the hate. It’s not about Biden or trump, it’s the anger.
Snap. My dad was always conservative but generally a pretty accepting person. Brexit and COVID really sent him down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole and he’s gone full blown racist nut job.
There’s a huge amount of topics which are just off limits with my family now in the efforts of retaining some sort of relationship. Fortunately they live 6 hours away so we don’t see them that often.
It’s strange, it’s like they also put these topics above family.
I was like: “Dad, let’s not talk politics” and he didn’t understand why.
This is something that took hold on people worldwide.
For my dad it was COVID and Bolsonaro, the brasilian ex-president was his hero. I live in Germany and friends have told similar stories, about their relatives.
My dad was corrupted by social media. It’s getting a bit better, because he doesn’t have unlimited computer access anymore. But not long ago, his first sentence, after we hadn’t talked for a while, was: “What do you think about the woke agenda?”
He really suspended his real life and was almost 24/7 online and got deep in the wrong meta neighborhood.
My father was never like that before, i hope it’s not some state of perception that many of us are doomed to have sometime, because it’s age related.
I’m sorry to hear that. I “lost” my father in the same way. He was always conservative (listened to Rush when I was a kid), but he went from casually conservative to full MAGA radicalized thanks to facebook and modern social media. I went to his facebook a few years back and saw some of the most hateful vitriolic content. I asked him how he could do that to people who helped raise me, that I had both LGBTQ and mixed race teachers, leaders, friends, all of whom have been incredibly important to me. It did not go well. I had to tell him to allow his hate speech would be a disservice to everyone else who had such a profound impact on me, and told him if he loses the hate we can have a relationship again.
That was 6 years ago. Haven’t heard from him since.
I hope your dad is doing better than mine. I’ve seen others confirm what you said, that just cutting out the source will see a return to semi normalcy - the propaganda depends on a constant drip. Just disconnecting them from the feed can have a huge positive impact.
Very sorry to hear that, i hope there’s a near future in which you can come together with your father again.
What gets me every time, is the similarities in all stories i hear. It got really bad one time with my father, when we had a LGTBQ related discussion. I’m always shocked when i hear Anti-LGTBQ discussion points. It’s like, they would rather kill 'em all, than to just live their own live and give a fuck who is fucking who.
As long as it’s all consensual adults …
Society should rather look at the sexual activities in their own circles. Most children are abused by relatives. While i have never heard of a transgender person abusing a child, i constantly hear about priests abusing children.
I live in another country than my parents and sometimes I’m grateful for that. I don’t know how i would have handled it, if we had constant contact and am somehow happy i didn’t have to. The distance is hard enough, everyone is getting older and i would love to be able to sit with my father in the garden and watch birds, like in the long ago times.
I opted to evade discussion and to try not to discuss anything politics with my father. I don’t want to spend the limited time we have together, fighting with him over such an absurd take on everything alive.
Think about it, the older they get, the less they’ll change. I figured that I’ll have to ignore that, talk about others things. It’s the only way, if i want to keep our relationship alive. There’s no more time to let grass grow over it or to let time heal things.
I appreciate it, and I hope your interactions with your father go better too. I know many many people who take your approach, just avoiding it. There’s no real right or wrong way, because we shouldn’t be in that position in the first place. I hope they stop bringing it up around you and respect your wishes about it.
Re: circles, maybe keeping it personal will help too. Turning off Fox news and sources will help, but my dad sure did shut up when I brought up the people he knew (and I know he liked) that he was talking about. They always go “They’re one of the good ones”, but then the reverse is “These policies effect the good ones too, dad”
i really appreciated our conversation. It made me rethink my behavior and realize that only avoiding talking about the elephant in the room may be the wrong thing.
Let’s see what the future brings.
I sure hope our dads may come around one day and also try to talk and discuss everything, without going directly into “I’m right, fight me” mode.
I know it’s weird here on the fediverse, but I’ve been through it. If you want, DM me anytime, or DM me and I can give my mastodon. Should probably start a community sometime. It’s been good talking to you too!
I wish you luck, but be prepared for anger in response. Just be ready for it. Make it not about the politics but instead the hate, the anger. Hell try to make it about politics but instead make it about the hate. It’s not about Biden or trump, it’s the anger.
Same goes for you - DM anytime. Good advice in your last paragraph. Thanks!
Snap. My dad was always conservative but generally a pretty accepting person. Brexit and COVID really sent him down the conspiracy theory rabbit hole and he’s gone full blown racist nut job. There’s a huge amount of topics which are just off limits with my family now in the efforts of retaining some sort of relationship. Fortunately they live 6 hours away so we don’t see them that often.
It’s strange, it’s like they also put these topics above family.
I was like: “Dad, let’s not talk politics” and he didn’t understand why.
This is something that took hold on people worldwide.
For my dad it was COVID and Bolsonaro, the brasilian ex-president was his hero. I live in Germany and friends have told similar stories, about their relatives.
Stick around here and you’ll just be a dogmatic arch evangelist around that age!