I’m new to the bidet scene, and this one has me slightly confounded. Should I install a new towel rack next to the toilet? Should my wife and I share the towel? Do you wipe first? There are so many unanswered questions in the ways of bidet-ing!

  • @apfelwoiSchoppen
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    1586 months ago

    Bidet wash first. Then tp to dry and to, well there is no nice way of saying this, check how the bidet wash did its job. Used appropriately, you should use significantly less tp than before.

    • @wjrii
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      606 months ago

      For anyone with a sewer system built for TP, this is an ideal workflow. Poops and poopers are not identical, and bidets are not magical. Trust but verify, friends.

      • @JubilantJaguar
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        396 months ago

        Pet peeve. Whatever three-quarters of the world seems to believe, any sewerage system can handle TP. That is: real TP has almost zero fiber integrity, it literally turns to goop on contact with water. Goop that has no more structural consistency than an average pile of sh*t. If still in any doubt then just make sure to flush it in single sheets, each one will be a pea-sized ball of goop. This misunderstanding seems to be purely cultural. I’ve been to a ton of developing countries, all with the usual dodgy sewerage systems and narrow-bore pipes. Yet only some of them, notably Latin America, have the disgusting cultural norm of TP bins. The rest understand that there is a difference between TP and paper towels designed for the kitchen and your face. TP is always flushable, by design.

        • @[email protected]
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          496 months ago

          And generally, baby wipes, bottom wipes and face wipes aren’t safe to flush, even if they say flushable on the package. If they were safe to flush, you wouldn’t be able to pull out a wet sheet from the package; it would be goo.

        • @[email protected]
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          56 months ago

          I thought it was natural, but it turns out TP is using PFAS so that it disintegrates as much as possible. That was kind of a bummer to learn. :/

          • @[email protected]
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            66 months ago

            Wtf. Just looked this up and you’re right. It seems like literally everything contains either toxic chemicals or plastics, unless you made it yourself without them.

            • @[email protected]
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              16 months ago

              Yeah, that was a bit depressing. The PFAS make it a lot more water soluble. My guess is that old TP didn’t break down very well at all, and was kinda splintery (or at least more paper-y).

              Luckily, the bidet removes much of that as long as you don’t use TP. And for those that have bad pipes or a septic system, I think a bidet is an invaluable part of saving you lots of money, since you aren’t packing extra material down the pipes.

        • @[email protected]
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          36 months ago

          The cheap toilet paper can be submerged in water for like 48 hours before breaking down. So for many who only buy the cheapest, clogging pipes is a reality. Their own fault, but still.

          • @[email protected]
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            6 months ago

            I try not to blame individuals for the failure of systems, especially ones as exploitative and damaging as capitalism. Why blame the people who can only afford the cheapest toilet paper when you could blame the corporation that made the cheapest toilet paper clog toilets? The people with the least money have the most negative repercussions. How are they supposed to know it clogs toilets without having to learn the hard way? Why wouldn’t you assume that toilet paper would all be equally safe to flush no matter how cheap it is?

          • @daltotron
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            16 months ago

            I mean you could always just wipe your ass, leave the TP in the bowl for like 48 hours, and then flush it, but then that kinda seems unsustainable unless everyone has their own toilet and only needs to poop every 48nhours which isn’t gonna be the case in a poor country I bet.

    • Sabata
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      156 months ago

      Pooping solo, a roll of TP will last me a month or two. A pack of TP will last well over a year.

    • @saltesc
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      86 months ago

      This has always disturbed me. As a non-bidet user, when I have used them (a dozen or so times) an additional final sweep has definitely been required. And yet so many bidet users are adamant everything is magically 100% clean. I now just assume they’re walking around oblivious to a spot of wet mud peppered around the rim of their margherita.

      • @apfelwoiSchoppen
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        266 months ago

        People are different, some folks are hairy, some folks aren’t. I am unclear as to why this is “disturbing”.

        • @[email protected]
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          -16 months ago

          My hot take is that everyone should be shaving their asshole, maybe even their crack. If your ass looks like someone slammed a wig in a suitcase, you need to trim that shit before extruding play-doh though it.

          You cannot get that hair 100% clean, especially if shit dries in it.

              • Skeezix
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                46 months ago

                Most people shit the same time every day. If you just nudge your shit cycle to be right before your daily shower then all this hassle goes away

      • @Dabundis
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        176 months ago

        I think of it as being (sorta) similar to spraying and wiping down a dirty countertop. The spray alone isn’t going to get it fully clean, but it makes the wipe about a thousand times more effective at finishing the job.

        • Skeezix
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          16 months ago

          Which is like trying to wipe peanut butter off a counter top with just a dry paper towel.

      • @Bocky
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        116 months ago

        If you have mud, your gi tract is not as healthy as it could be. Bidets are not designed to clean Peanut butter of carpet

      • mad_asshatter
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        66 months ago

        You should advertise for a tutor.

        Seriously, this is NOT difficult.

      • @dohpaz42
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        56 months ago

        It took me a little bit to figure out, but it’s all about the “aim” of the spray. If you’re not positioned just right, it might not be washing the area completely. But when it does, it’s so satisfying seeing a clean piece of wet tp.

      • @[email protected]
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        36 months ago

        Depends on the nozzle size and whether you get one that oscillates, not all are built equally. Mine is always sparkling. Can confirm this on another person, as a corollary of dating, haha.

        My bidet has enough power to strip spraypaint off concrete, lol.

      • Vaquedoso
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        6 months ago

        I suppose it depends if you are using it correctly or not. I’ve used a bidet all my life, and where i live bidets are a separate bowl from the toilet, made from the same materials, and virtually every household has one. I’ve never had a problem of it not cleaning enough

        EDIT: Here’s an image. You can see the bidet has a kind of jet of water coming upwards with force, exactly below where you would sit. You can regulate the intensity and if done properly you can clean yourself completely https://images.app.goo.gl/6w3EMWrAk34DBwJd7

      • Jeena
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        36 months ago

        I personally can feel it if the water went everywhere and enough. I never had brown on the tp afterwards. You probably don’t wash long enough or too low preassure or no movement, etc.

        I can see that for a beginner there are things to figure out on how to use it efficiently. Sa.e as beginner of tp usage.

      • Ephera
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        26 months ago

        My experience has been that it makes the perimeter squeaky-clean, but obviously with a finger, you can do some digging. And if you dig deep enough, there’s always going to be mud.

        And also in my experience, this digging doesn’t actually help. You’ve got a great gate down there. If the outside of that gate is clean, you’re clean. Digging out from behind that gate doesn’t do much, because new mud will push up against it pretty soon.

      • @ABCDE
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        26 months ago

        You bidet it clean enough, then use your hand to wash your backside, then dry.

        • @Delta_V
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          116 months ago

          What, and I can’t stress this enough, the fuck?

            • MudMan
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              96 months ago

              Is it?

              Are we in one of these social media posts where we rediscover that a bunch of people have not been washing their bums in the shower for their entire lives and we have to carry on living with that knowledge?

              • Ephera
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                26 months ago

                This is not about the shower. There’s different kinds of bidets. Some just sprinkle your nether regions. Others are a full-blown sink for you to scrub yourself. And yet others are the so-called “bum guns”, where you’ve got a hose next to your toilet to sploosh it away.

                • ASeriesOfPoorChoices
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                  56 months ago

                  bum guns are the…

                  shit.

                  (••) , ( ••)>⌐■-■ , (⌐■_■)

                  YEEEEAAAHH!

                • MudMan
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                  16 months ago

                  Water on your bum is water on your bum. If the caveat is that magical built-in bidets don’t need a scrub (as much), why is your reply to my post and not the “muslim thing” guy? Wouldn’t it apply equally to both?

                  • Ephera
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                    36 months ago

                    I just thought, you got confused, because you mentioned the shower. I figured, maybe you’re not aware of the bidets where one can reasonably wash their whole bums. If you weren’t confused, then carry on. 🙃

              • @apfelwoiSchoppen
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                6 months ago

                Yes. Wash your hands, wash your ass isn’t as common as you might expect in North America. It also isn’t just a “Muslim thing” as you point towards. That invalidates Muslim beliefs and customs as well as reducing the pervasive and varying global cultural etiquettes around cleaning one’s self after bodily functions. A wide swath of north americans are only taught the toilet paper wipe bit.

                • MudMan
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                  16 months ago

                  Hey, I do get that bidets aren’t culturally well established everywhere, and even in bidet areas they don’t often come with detailed instructions, so usage habits are kinda random.

                  But that’s why I went to the shower bit instead. I would hope cleaning your nethers when you shower is a universal habit, or at least as much of one as washing your hands after a trip to the toilet.

                  But hey, maybe permanently sweaty, poopy undercarriages are just… you know, “an American thing”? I don’t know.

                  • @apfelwoiSchoppen
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                    6 months ago

                    Showers, bidets, ass rags, tp, hands, whatever combination follows the wash your hands, wash your ass ethos to get the job done. Your skin will thank you.

          • @daltotron
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            16 months ago

            This is the case with many countries where toilet paper is cheap and shitty and will clog the hundred years old shared plumbing systems which probably drains into the same system as the rainwater drainage. They still have plumbing systems, though, so some form of bidet is still viable. So, wash with your left, eat with your right, as is common in india. Not too big of a problem, I’d say, so long as you have soap and water to wash your hand afterwards and you do a thorough job, and maybe also have a diet where you’re not shitting your brains out every time, and maybe also have a shaved asshole or something, but yeah.