• @Zombiepirate
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    18
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    4 months ago

    He feeds his fingernail clippings to squirrels

    He tips with those fake $100 bill religious tracts

    He stands to the left on the peoplemover in the airport

    He prefers his socks sweaty and “crunchy”

    He begins most conversations with “don’t you know who I am?”

    He does that thing when he talks where he gets too close and starts rubbing your shoulder

    • @elliot_crane
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      73 months ago

      He tips with those fake $100 bill religious tracts

      I know most of these are just silly digs for the memes, but I could 100% see prince couchfucker doing this and thinking in his mind that he actually did the server a favor.

    • @Thebeardedsinglemalt
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      63 months ago

      He uses metal utensils on teflon non-stick pots and pans, then immediately runs them under cold tap water because finds the sizzle soothing

      He orders a salad with the dressing on the side and eats everything but the lettuce

      He puts quick-dry clothes in the wash on HOT and leaves them in the dryer for an hour on maximum temperature

      He waits until it’s his turn to order to start looking at the menu when dining at fast food joints

      He showers everywhere, even at home, in a bathing suit because even he thinks it’s totally gay if he sees any male’s genitals…even his own

      He goes to a fancy steakhouse, orders a filet mignon well done, and dips it in ketchup packets he brought in his pocket

      Whenever he plays Cards Against Humanity, every round he says “I don’t get it”

      He never swallows fruit seeds because he will argue to the death that the seeds will grow inside you. Same with chewing gum and takes 5-7 years to digest it