• @TexasDrunk
    link
    62 months ago

    Why didn’t they put the newspaper in the mailbox? Because the 12 year old on a bicycle at 4am doesn’t have time for your particular brand of bullshit.

    Federal law prohibits anyone from putting materials into a mailbox without postage.

    Otherwise I agree with you.

    • @Lost_My_Mind
      link
      22 months ago

      Oh shit…I didn’t know that. And it means I unknowingly committed federal crimes when I was 14.

      I used to write these really fucked up letters, addressed to “Satan, or current home owner” with their address on the envelope. But I never put postage on it. I just put it in their mailbox.

      And what I did was took a jar of strawberry jelly, and let it liquify. Then I’d dip my pinky in the liquid and use that as the “ink”. Well on white paper, the whole thing looked like blood. And I would write these nonsensical letters to “Satan Claws”. As if he were Santa, and would spread horror once a year on halloween.

      Keep in mind, the whole letter looked like it was written in blood. Then I’d end the letter by saying “This weeks Pokemon of the week is…” and I’d staple a random picture of a pokemon cut out from Nintendo Power.

      I did this once a week every week through summer break 1998.

      The last letter before school started back up just said “Today was a good day, but now I have to die…” and then a “bloody” handprint. No pokemon.

      After that, I never wrote another letter, but everyday in the 1998-1999 school year, I left an apple in his mailbox every week day. No explaination. Then it ended when summer break 1999 started.

      Thats when we picked a random phone number and prank called it every day in the 1999 summer break until they used the police to trace the number and tried to sue my dad. Thats when the judge noticed my dad was a middle aged white guy, not a 1970s street pimp named JaMarcus. The best part is while they were IN COURT I was at Geauga Lake which was an amusement park. While they were in court, I used a payphone to prank call that number one last time.

      I’d never do that stuff today, but I do laugh at how much of an asshole teenage me was. We never did hear from the guy who we wrote letters to, and left apples for. He may have been amused, or he may have disturbed. We’ll never know.

      • @TexasDrunk
        link
        32 months ago

        That’s kinda disturbing. We’re the same age and I’ll tell you right now that you’re exactly the kind of person that I would have been friends with because I did fucked up shit as well. Just not with as much dedication as you.

      • Cadeillac
        link
        English
        32 months ago

        You crack me up damn near every fucking day. Thank you friend